Hii Kelloulou, 

I soooo feel for you and yours. I/ we were in exactly the same position as you this time last year.

Husband, aged 56  had  Just had the big diagnosis and started the 1st FLOT. 
Like you, we were petrified and lost in an utter whirlwind.

BUT- here we are a year on 8 FLOT cycles down, major surgery and now 'visable disease free'

Belive it or not there are an awful lot of us about. We have another board, where there are about 10 post treatment, 5 or so mod treatment and some who are having different stuff, but we are all proud members of the 'Oesophageal cancer club' (:

The board was started by Rayb, look it up, if you want to come over, or press my blue hilts thing and look up followed discussions.

Over the last year, we have all laughed , cried, wobbled like jelly, but still here we all are.

So , yes, it is not what you would want, and could find other things to be doing with your time, but here we all are

Best wishes

Hilts