Dads got stage 2 bowel cancer (the worst kind)

I put a post about my dad having bowel cancer and found out today he has stage 2 Bowel cancer (the worst kind) 

They are going to start my dad on chemo first to blast it as much as possible then go from there. 
 

I'd be lying if I said I wasn't worried about him and how the chemo will effect him.  I know chemo effects people differently but im really worried it'll be like you see on the news or film where he loses all his hair, loses loads of weight, gets extremely irritable, weak! 
 

my dad is a mucley guy from up north so seeing him so vulnerable is really scaring me. 
 

if appriciate any one who's been in the same situation and how to deal with it? 
 

Do I try carry on with life and be happy? Or do I take time to just be sad? I honestly don't know why I should be doing with my life. I feel helpless. If I try to be happy and carry on with life I feel like I shouldn't be happy, I shouldn't smile because if I do does that mean I don't care for my dad? 
 

if you new me personally you'd know I'm a very anxious person who worry's a lot and I'm very emotional. I cry when I'm happy, when I'm sad, when it's a Tuesday! 

honestly if really appreciate some advice?! 
 

thanks 

Ellisha 

  • Hi

    Sorry to hear about your Dad's diagnosis. My Dad was diagnosed with lung cancer around 6 weeks ago, also with shadows on his liver and spine and I know exactly what you mean with all those emotions. When I first found out, it came at me like a sledge hammer. I felt sick, heartbroken, devastated and for days I cried, almost like I was in mourning because whenever you hear the word cancer, you automatically think the worst. I felt guilty for laughing if I did, for trying to carry on with normality (I have 2 children and currently 26 weeks pregnant), it was a rollercoaster of emotions and it still is. 

    My Dad started his first round of treatment (chemo and immunotherapy) 2 weeks ago, he has his second cycle next week. I won't lie, it's not a nice thing to see them go through and everyone is different with how the cope with treatment. My Dad has lost weight, but he did have a stressful couple of weeks leading up to his treatment, which I think took a toll on him too. He did have a few days where he slept all day but today he's eaten some bacon and eggs instead of his weetabix, he went out for a cup of tea yesterday and tomorrow he is going to try and do the same again. His skin looks a bit pale and as expected, just a bit weak. But apart from that, he has been OK.

    At the moment, all we can do is take each day as it comes, some days will be good and some will be bad. Support your Dad, try and keep him healthy and positive and also the same for yourself. I've had a day today where I am so exhausted I wanted to cry, I have Mum guilt, it's rained all day and I haven't done much with the kids today, but tomorrow is a new day.

    Try not to think too much into the future, I know what you're probably thinking, it's always on my mind too but you have to tackle one day at a time.

    Look after yourself, and keep us posted on your Dad.

    Take Care

    Lucie x