Am looking for advice on what I might expect, although I know it varies greatly for everyone.

Mum (70) was diagnosed with  Non-small cell lung cancer about two months ago.. maybe longer. The months seem to be blurring into one recently. I believe she's had it for a long time. At least two years because the lethargy and cough has been going on for as long as that, if not longer. 

She'd kept from my siblings and I that she has chronic obstructive pulmonary disease (COPD) for a few years too and has continued to smoke after my dad had a stroke about five or six years ago, and I didn't think the cough was more than asthma or necessarily a huge cause for concern. I thought maybe expected given the amount she smokes. She's very stubborn and only recently stopped now that she has no choice given she's in hospital at the moment. 

I always knew the day would come when I'd hear that mum has got lung cancer and as such, I feel I am almost going through anticipatory grief. It's been particularly hard for my dad who cries nearly every time I call home since mum was admitted to hospital as they live together, don't have many friends and so have been together every day as sole companions since covid, and even years before then.

Since being diagnosed mum hadn't left bed with the exception to a few occassions. She seemed relatively upbeat and still had a little bit of an appetite. This went on for about a month alongside tests to determine the best course of treatment. My mum opted against surgery as they advised the growth was too big and she may not survive the operation. The risks were high. In the past two weeks, she's started to get a lot of pain. She was managing with cocadamol and what she'd been prescribed but then it got worse and we had the paramedics around a few times. 

Last week, it got too much for her to manage and so she went in to hospital. The growth is large but only on one lung at the moment, but from what I understand it is putting pressure on the nerves of surrounding areas which is what is causing the pain. They have struggled to get it under control and today have another meeting to discuss her options. Palliative radiotherapy seems to be what they're thinking of doing at the moment. 

Comparatively to what I have read, mum seems to be somewhere in the middle of early advanced stages to stage 4. Once at stage 4, it seems the detioration becomes even quicker and survival doesn't seem to be much more than 6 or so weeks once they have reached that stage and may have been brought home at that point with Macmillan visits.

I don't really know what to expect and am wondering if anyone could let me know their experience of this if at all. If mum doesn't have long I want to be around as much as possible but it feels I have no idea at the moment. Yesterday on my way to work my dad called me in tears and said they couldn't get her pain under control and didn't really know what to do and I interpreted that as I needed to get to the hospital and start preparing for the worst. Today, they are meeting but even with the radiotherapy I don't know how long she may have. I am struggling to keep my mind from wondering and keeping focused on work. I am on probation as I am in a new job and took yesterdaay off. Today I haven't started working and it is nearly 1pm. I have also bought my first house which I can't focus on and worried about losing my job.. paying the mortgage etc. I don't really want a prognosis as such, but if I had some kind of idea of other's experiences at this stage and what the time looked like from this point, I feel I could manage my stress a little bettter. 

Thanks in advance