Hi there ... and welcome to our little chat room....

Now take some deep breaths .... your in that weird first mode of panic and "what ifs" and wanting to know everything ... your brain is probly going 100 miles an hour ... but dont think most of us know that feeling ... it's normal ... so be kind to your self ... take a little time to digest your thoughts but one at a time ...

I was lucky my daughter in law wrote everything down ... listenened and asked questions ... it was Just a blur to me after hearing I had a grade 3 breast cancer ... so later I could ask her ... so get yourself a pad and pen ... write down those questions ... ask your dad if he has any ... and call his oncology team...  and they may have to get back to you .. but write their answers down ... and know to some questions there's no answer just estimates ...

I took two days crying alone in my room .. my head like yours then my daughter in law sat me and my son down and said ... no more panicking... no more "what ifs" no looking ahead ... well stay in the day and take each problem as and when it comes up.... well I wish everyone had a person in their lives like my daughter in law.... it was the best advice I've ever had ...

Once we stopped the panic we could work together and get through my masectomy and stuff together .. because we all felt stronger we coped way better .. though we all admitted we were scared and we listened to each other's fears ... so instead of one taking the load ... we all shared it together ... so come on ... this is a marathon,  not a sprint ... you can do this .... together ... mine was 2017 and I'm still here talking to you.... against the odds ... taking one day at a time still ... Chrissie x

Chrissie 

Thank you for reply, I have read it over and over and  I love that 'it's a marathon not a sprint' it's really resonating with me. Thank you for sharing your journey and the ups and downs that we are feeling and that you and your family understand. I was hesitant about posting but am so glad I did and so glad you replied because I am now feeling a calmness. I will take your advice and I will write everything down and ask the questions and take one day at a time. I will also share the load with my siblings as as the oldest I'm probably /likely if truth be told taking over . Thank you again