My wife and I managed to eventually get married just before Christmas, despite Covid. The day was wonderful despite not having all our friends there and we hoped to kick on with our lives and begin to have a family. I'm 40 and my wife is 35.
Only a month later, my wife noticed a lump in her breast and underwent the regular checks. On the two month anniversary of our wedding, we received the devastating news that she had invasive lobular breast cancer, with a tumour 5cm in size. At the time, the nurse said it hadn't spread and was very treatable.
The nhs were great and they offered us ivf which we took as treatment would delay us trying for a few years plus chemo could permanently damage her overaries. We managed to freeze eight embryos.
My wife then had a mastectomy with four lymph nodes removed as precaution and we through we were cancer free. However, when we were invited back to get the results disaster struck, and 3/4 lymph nodes were positive with the diaganosis T2 N1 Mx.
She has a PT scan next week to determine if it has spread any further.
This really set us back and now the book is being thrown at her as part of her treatment. 4 months of chemo, further surgery then radiation.
Whilst I'm now very concern for my wife's long term future, I'm also questioning the prospect of being an older parent. I'll be 43 and my wife will be 37/8 when we will be allowed to even try and conceive as she has to have two years minimum of tamoxifen.
Has anyone else been in this situation at our ages and come out of it positively? Trying to think positively currently and failing miserably.
