Hello UzmaA, 

This is such a difficult decision to have to take and I am sorry that your cancer has come back in the same breast and that you had these issues after your first chemotherapy four years ago. I hope that your surgery goes well and that you will get a chance to discuss all this at great length and to explore all your options with your consultant after surgery. Perhaps they can tell you more for example about whether they would have ways of minimizing the side effects you experienced the first time around?

Should you wish to have a chat with one of our cancer nurses about this too, you are very welcome to give them a call on this free number 0808 800 4040. Their helpline is open Monday to Friday from 9am to 5pm. 

Best of luck with the surgery. Do come back and keep us updated if you get a chance as to how things go for you.  

Best wishes, 

Lucie, Cancer Chat Moderator

Hi Uzma 

I really feel your worry and frustration and fear.my mum is in a similar situation. Triple negative , stage 3 cancer . She has had cancer in her breast 3 times,lumpectomy, mastectomy of one breast , then mastectomy of the other breast . Followed by Radium , and chemo which made her cronically ill. She has be clear for 8 years . Recent surgery went well and she has now been offered Chemo - with a 5% rate of effectiveness- with no guarantee's. She is now 76 so fighting chemo again will seriously effect her body and I doubt she will fully recover . The oncologist and surgeon say it's her decision -but how do you make such a decision based on those statistics and side effects . If it was me I would not go through that again. Having said that any chance of saving her life cannot be rejected. She has been given some time to think but it's really getting her down . As I am sure it is with you.
 

With the greatest respect tho the cancer chat moderator - your response whilst kind and well intended does not help form a decision. I would like to know what a oncologist / specialist  would do in this situation if it was them or their family member . 

I have little knowledge but if I was in your situation. I would have a mastectomy then  a reconstruction as the fear of it coming back again would be too much. We are all different . There is such a great support network yet nobody can really advise what they would do in that situation. 
 

Please do write a update .

sending love and strength xx 

Hi Lozi

I can't agree more.For early stages cancer chemo do bad than good.Can I ask did ur mum had to go through chemo all three times?Tomorrow have another meeting let's see what happens.I obviously do not want to leave my kids without their mum.but I want to stay healthy and active mum not a mum who is always tired and sleepy.

Hi Uzma

I Hope you are ok. You have so much to contend with you must be so overwhelmed with worry. This disease is so cruel.

My mum only had Chemo once - that was after her last surgery 8 years ago. She had a terrible reaction to it , I can't imagine having treatment and being a busy mum. It is so incredibly hard.Having said that I know 4 people who have had chemo in the last year and they had a great tolerance to it , slight side effects apart hair loss and tiredness which generally lasted just the day afterwards . Which is incredible. Still not great, as both are really  tough but it gave hope that treatment has improved . I run a care home and both staff and residents (all different ages ) have tolerated Chemo really well;  so my mum seems to be in the minority . We did hope the chemo would be different - that gave us some hope , as did the oncologist but they confirmed it would be the same EC chemo. There is a new medication that is offered along with the Chemo  - paclitaxil which has really awful side effects too .  So you are between a rock and a hard place ️
 

One thing that was suggested, which is worth consideration , she could try Chemo and if she couldn't tolerate the side effects she could stop anytime . So that is good to know. It really does feel like Russian Roulette . 
 

A question I will ask on our next review but fear I won't like the answer is;  what screening will be provided if she does not have chemo. When I asked how do they know it's not spread to other areas; the answer is they don't and rely on symptoms :ie; pain or lumps. I find that so scary, as these are not always present , in addition; mammograms wont be suitable after a full mastectomy. If regular screening was available, one would hope cancer would be detected early and surgery would be provided. 

I can only begin to imagine the trauma and constant worry that this causes you and others going through this. I must say my mum has received Fantastic care and support , it could not have been better but there is no clear path due to the nature of the disease -there is so much information to digest, so many pros and cons  . Yet there are no guarantees - or assurances sadly to help with your choices due to the nature and unpredictability of cancer . 

I don't feel I have helped a lot either but hope by sharing experiences it helps a little .  Good luck for tomorrow . I find it helps to record the appointment ( with permission )  so you can listen to it again and understand the conversation better as there is so much to take in.

Hope you feel up to sharing how it goes and your decision. 

Good luck xxxx 

Hi Lozi,

So I had an appointment today with the consultant,she said that we decided that we are happy to do mastectomy without chemo but there is a small gland found in ct scan above ur collar bone so we would do the biopsy to make sure if somethings comes up then we have to do chemo and radio as surgery cannot be performed bcz of the sensitivity of the area.Radiologist whi was doing my biopsy told me straightaway that it is a cancer,but you ll get the result next week.It seems for some people to is never a choice to chose their treatment,they are meant to suffer and struggle to live for this life which is worth or not.......Sorry I am bit shattered today.

Hi ‍♀️ 

I am truly gutted for you. You must feel so low and deflated and devastated. Words don't describe how sad I feel for you. 
 

Hope you find rest and some peace tonight. It always helps me to think tomorrow will be better. Tomorrow , it's a new day. Take one day at a time , know you will get through the day with the love of your children. I hope you have friends and family and support around you. You can do this!!! 
Sending love and a abundance of strength

Hi Lozi

Last few weeks were really tough as my radiologist said she is sure that my cancer has spread to my neck and made another tumour.But God is great it was nothing but a tb scar tissue.So hopefully I would be able to decide for my treatment plan.My single mastectomy is on Tuesday.Hopefully things will go fine.Thank you for your support.Are you on fb by any chance :)?

I have early breast cancer, have had chemo and mastectomy along with other treatments.  Look at your life another way, without the treatment you've had, perhaps you would not be around to have a lovely baby or to see your 7 year old play.  Yes I have fatigue and ongoing side effects like severe joint pain but six feet above will always be better than six feet under.  

I looked at the Predict breast cancer site to help guide my decisions.  Without the treatment I've had so far my life expectancy would be very different.

Hi Livi

I already have chemo radio and lumpectomy for the same breast and right after 3 years cannot do more.My original plan was radio and mastectomy only.but bcz they cannot do radio twice for the same breast so they said we recommend chemo but choice is urs.