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Father just diagnosed stage IV lung cancer - how long...?

lachlanm
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Hi all

My Dad has just been diagnosed today with stage IV lung cancer on admission to hospital with a potential chest infection.

He is 78, slightly overweight, was a lifelong smoker until about 5 years ago and has drunk heavily all his adult life. I'm under no illusions that he's on borrowed time. My problem is that with the Covid lockdown, visits are nigh on impossible. He's on the East coast in Lincolnshire whereas I'm on the other side of the country in Lancashire. I haven't had a chance to speak to the hospital yet, but are we talking potentially days to live given his risk factors, rather than weeks or months? I've got 3 young kids and my wife and I both work full time so I'm trying to gauge whether or what I should be planning around trying to see him before it's too late.

Thanks

L

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    Hi there ..

    I'm so sorry , it must be heartbraking and this covid lockdown makes it even cruler ...

    From what I've learned working in care homes and my own family, no one can give you how long ... I've seen some who looked like they only had hours, to rally round and be sitting up the next day, to others who looked perfectly o.k and just went ... 

    I think if you call his team, they may be able to give you a rough idea ... but I'd say, listen to your heart .. if you visit him now, you'll always have that memory... if you wait and he goes, how will you feel ... I never got the chance to say goodbye to my mum ... she had a heart attack and was gone in the blink of an eye .. it still hurts my heart I never got to do that or hold her hand ... 

    So I'd say grab it ... but it's down to you .. just know every day is precious now ... sending you a vertual hug.... Chrissie x

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    Hello it depends if he has treatment.i have lung mets since 2019shhrinking with chemo but still here.So you have to see how he is going or offer some treatment.Even with no treatment and right diet can live longer.

     

    Denisa

  • Offline in reply to Chriss

    hi, so sorry to learn this, I lost my Dad & my brother to lung cancer. I would say it depends which type they have sml cell etc.My Dad had terrible tummy pain, he was diagnosed secondary cancer in the liver and when we found out he was given less than 2weeks to live, he went down hill quick but survived for 5weeks lost him April 2000 lung cancer was on his D.C.

     My brother had his pain in the back of his right shoulder he was diagnosed with a pancoast tumour in the October, this spread to his brain, he was paralysed down his left side but had all his marbles, it was 1mm off his osophigus and so could not be removed, and in the may was given less than 48hrs, he went on for another 5weeks after that and we lost him June 2016. 

    There were people who were still alive 5yrs later of a lung cancer diagnosis on my Dad's wald, there is also a lady accross the road to me who is is a survivor of lung cancer  of which she beat 10yrs ago.

    i really do hope you gain some quality time with your Dad and that the cancer is treatable.

    God bless take care xx

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    I think you should go see your dad, let work know what's going on and arrange some time off. Maybe your wife could do the same to stay home with the kiddies. My mum was was stage 4 when diagnosed and passed away 9 weeks later. I just wish I knew she had so little time left. I wish you all the best. 

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