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My mum has been diagnosed with stage 4 bowel cancer

JessicaT
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my mum has recently been diagnosed with atage 4 bowel cancer, she is going to begin to have her terminal chemo therapy. She has broken down a few times and it absolutely breaks my heart. I am a nurse myself, so she is coming to me for questions and answers which can make it quiet difficult although at the same time I want to help her.  She is struggling to come to terms with it all as she is only 45 and her worst fear was being diagnosed with cancer. 

 

Does anyone have any advice how they coped? I'm in tears everyday, particularly before bed. The thought of loosing her breaks me and I'm struggling to be strong when I know i need to be for her.

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    Hello JessicaT, 

    I am so sorry to hear about your mum's diagnosis at such a young age. I can imagine the news is really heartbreaking for you and I hope that the chemotherapy treatment will be effective for her.

    I am sure your mum really appreciates your support and I completely understand how difficult it can be for you as a nurse to be in the position of having to answer her questions. Perhaps if you think it would be easier for you, you could pass on to your mum the number of our cancer nurses' helpline? She would be welcome to call them and ask them any question she may have. You can reach them on this free number 0808 800 4040 - their line is open Monday to Friday from 9am to 5pm. 

    I hope that you will hear from some of our members who have been in a similar position and that they will share their story with you and tell you more about what helped them cope and keep strong. There is a section on our website for Family, Friends and Caregivers which I hope will be useful to you and will help you find ways not only to support your mum but also to take care of yourself at a time when it is often easy to forget to think about your own needs. 

    We're thinking of you during this difficult time and do feel free to come back to the forum anytime you want to talk to others who understand how you are feeling and what you are going through at the moment. 

    Best wishes, 

    Lucie, Cancer Chat Moderator

     

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    Hi jessica, 

     

    my dad also has advanced colin cancer, secondary liver cancer. 
    his had an op to remove part of his colon and now has a stoma and after a number if issues keeping us back and fourth to hospital he starts chemo on the 23rd october both targed drugs at home via a tablet and every 21 days in hospital. His op was 3 weeks ago but its heen whirlwind you dont get time to take it all in, neither do they too be honest my dad has always got a question at the most random of times. 
     

    i think the only advice i can give is to make her smile, i often go and lay with my dad and annoy him chatting crap until he says emough kirst lol i guess every day is differwnt she will have pisitive days, bad days, angry days but she jas your support, and you have ours xxxx

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