Hi there ...

Oh my, no wonder your feeling so lost, your not alone , we all feel scared and confused, when we heard the word, cancer ...everything else goes into a bit of a blur ...

I was diagnosed with a grade three breast cancer,  in 2017 , and shut myself away for nearly 2 days,  seeing no one and crying and cussing at this word, everyone dreads hearing .. my son was like you,, and we were both panicking,... then my daughter in law sat us down and said no more what ifs and no more panicking... we will take each problem as and when it comes up...  and we'll do it together....

That was the best advice I ever had... it was like a light was turned on .. I got my self a pair of pink vertual boxing gloves... put them on and got in the ring and looked cancer in the eye .. no matter the outcome, I was gonna do my best to kick it's ***...

So we did this as a family .. holding on, through highs and lows... coz it's a bit like a rollercoaster ride..  but there's lots of us on that rollercoaster,  and in the ring .. cancer wants you to lay down and never get up.... it wants us weak,  and then it feels strong ... well when I came on here, like you at the beginning of my journey... I chatted to about 5/6 others on here, all different stages and treatments of their breast cancer ... that was 3 years ago ... one lass had a baby boy after treatment, and now just found out she's having another .. the others, most have gone back to their life post cancer.... wer all still here ..

We hear of all those who lost their journey on t.v.. but they dont say how many of us, carry on ... l just took everything one day at a time .. and every day after my masectomy, to me is a bonus, every day, wake up and say, yep still here ... the one thing cancer gives us, is a love of life, the normal things that we didn't even notice before ..

So get all those feelings out now and along the way .. that's good, then get your boxing gloves on, and don't let it intimidate you .. it's not an easy journey, but it is doable ... your right at the start, with a long way to go.. but lots of others have done the same journey as your daughter, and with you fighting in her courier, one step, at a time .. you'll get there ... always here most days if you want a chat ...

Sending you a vertual hug.... Chrissie xx

Hi Chrissie,

Thank you for the support. My daughter also has cystic fibrosis, she has been fighting to stay alive most of her life.  It is going to be so hard for her as she is not as strong physically as a non cf woman.

Hi there ..

Well no wonder it's even harder for you, my niece has cystic fibrosis... I was working on maternity when she was born ... so I know just how hard this is, without cancer thrown in ...

So l recon you'll all need lots of help and councilling along the way ... I should think it makes everything more of a risk to take on ... that changes what I said earlier ... but taking one problem as and when it comes up, is still what will help you through ...

You've been through so much all ready .. it's a battle every day ... and I bet she's one of the nicest, kindest lasses you know .. I know my niece does ...  

I also had a son that was diagnosed diabetic at 14 .. and we've had some close calls with him .. he also has to medicate every day, and a hypo could take him at any time ... so I know that daily feeling of trying to just act normalish does to us parents ... and my granddaughter is battling acute myeloid leukaemia right now, waiting for her stem cell transplant... 

So hold on in there .. I'm here most days ... this is a great place to feel not alone ... sending you both caring vibes and a vertual hug... Chrissie xx

Hi 

I'm really sorry to hear about your daughter's diagnosis. I was diagnosed back in March with triple positive breast cancer. I'm not as young as your daughter (42) but still quite young to get this. This really is the worst time, you are bombarded with all this terminology and some of it really not making any sense - I didn't even realise that there was more than one type of breast cancer. I highly recommend ringing the Macmillan nurses, they really helped in my early days of diagnosis and also breast cancer now. They have a service called someone like me- they can match your daughter up with a volunteer who has gone through the same type of breast cancer at a similar age and the volunteer will phone every so often. They also produce lots of booklets and there is one about breast cancer in young women and just the other day I discovered they do weekends away for young women with breast cancer (obviously not in the current climate). There is also another support group called shine - it's for people in their 20s-40s who have been diagnosed with cancer. (Shinecancersupport.org) 

Things do get easier, once your daughter has a treatment plan in place, things do start moving along, like I say the first few days/weeks are the worst. This forum is great for help and support too.

Take care xx

Hi Sunshine,

Thank you for your wonderful words of support, this means so much to me! I am overwhelmed how lovely you all are!

I did ask about the volunteer match up, did not get much response yesterday to this.

Thanks again,

Best wishes,

take care with all,

Mum Jan xx

HI Chrissie,

Very sorry to hear about your granddaughter, how is she going along?  I know AML is not easy, my first daughter lost her battle to ALL  back in 1987. Things were a lot different then just as the treatment for CF has come on leaps and bounds.

I just hope that that the treatment for breast cancer has improved also.

Really love to hear your kind words, I very much appreciate this.

Let me know how you are now,

Best wishes,

Mum Jan 

xx