Thank you so much Chrissie for your response, your kind words and good advice. You are so right that he will open up when he's ready and to give him time. It's all so sudden and new right now.

Thank you and stay safe x

Hi there. Sorry, I'm a little late seeing this post and realise that things may have moved on now. If you haven't had an answer to this yet, I can tell you that, as a kidney cancer patient myself, you can't get a grade or staging until after surgery.  The tumour needs to go to the lab first to determine what type of kidney cancer it is (there are a few types) and how aggressive it is.

You should ask for a copy of the pathology report and also for the TNM score. T = how far it's spread; N = number of lymph nodes involved (hopefully 0) and M = metastases or spread.

There is another useful measurement called the Leibovich score, which gives an indication of his risk of recurrence.  Again zero is as good as this gets.

If you have Facebook, I would really recommend joining the Kidney Cancer Support Network group which is for patients and carers. I was found in the wilds of the internet by a lovely lady from that group, seardhing for information when I was first diagnosed. She brought me over to that online community and it was the best thing I ever did in my cancer journey. All the information you need will be on there.

P.S. It may help your husband to know that I am nearly 10 years since diagnosis and surgery. There are a lot of us long-timers out there - I hope this gives you a positive in this horrible time.