Hi lovely, so sorry to hear this, I can't advise any thing as I'm waiting on my results,  but I just wanted to send love and hugs xxx

Hi there ...

So sorry you've had to join our breast cancer journey... but there's lots of us on here .. the worse part is just hearing the news and waiting for things to start ... the emotions are all over the place ... then the "what ifs" echo in your head .. well just know what your feeling now is normal, that's how I was when I first come on here ... and a wonderful angel held my hand in those early days ...

My son started to panic ... I was all over the place when my daughter in law sat us down and said no more panicking... no more "what ifs "  well take every problem as and when it comes up ...and well do it together.... and that was the best advice l ever got given ...

Once I got all my emotion out, I started to change from feeling scared to saying o.k ... I'm ready to take it on ... got a pair of vertual boxing gloves and got in the cancer boxing ring .. ready to hit it strait back .. once I felt stronger, those around me could cope ... 

You'll be surprised how amazing youndpg ones are, if you give them gentle truth .. l did with my grandkids ... telling them yes I was very poorly, but the Drs were going to TRY to make nanny better... and you know it's o.k if they cry with you .. it shows your children it's o.k to feel scared .. it's o.k to cry ... and to have lots of hugs ... but it's when we keep them out of the loop, they get even nore frightened because they can only guess ... and young ones are amazing how they are able to get those emotions out but then go on to something else ... 

So when you feel ready, get those vertual boxing gloves on and join all of us breast lasses in the ring ... wer all doing well .. I'm nearly 2 years post masectomy... when I look at my scar, I know it's a small price to pay for still seeing my granddaughter... treatment has come a long way .. there's lots of us kicking cancers butt ... it's not an easy journey.. but together wer strong ... you'll always get support and answers to questions on here .. being brave is feeling scared witless but still doing what you have to anyway ... that's brave ...  big vertual hug...  Chrissie xx 

Thank you so much, good luck with your results xxx

Hi there

Sorry to hear the reason why you’ve posted.  I was diagnosed mid March with BC I have 2 children aged 7 and 9, and have been through a whole spectrum of emotions in that time including what to tell the children and worrying about how they will react.  All of those emotions are normal, luckily there are some awesome people on this forum who can hold you hand through it all.

My BC will be treated through chemo, then a mastectomy and then radiotherapy. Prior to that the extra scans I had picked up I had and inflamed appendix, and I am currently recovering from having it removed last week. 

i told my children that I had a bug and that I needed to have some strong medicine to kill it, and I talked to them about what that medicine might make me feel like and look like and what help I needed from them. I decided to only tell them about the treatment that’s facing me at the time rather than the whole lot. And you know they have been amazing, they got upset, and they ask me questions all of the time,  but they also get their little boxing mitts on to protect me and look after me.  You know you’re children the best you will know what is the right thing to do. 

Keep in touch, I’m around if you want to talk anything through. X

WL

Thank you for your reply. It’s been a very emotional day, I live on my own with my children and we are very close. I have been open from the beginning but just telling them what I think they need to know without hopefully not worrying them. I don’t feel comfortable with the fact other people know and they didn’t, so I did it individually, my 12 year old daughter was very practical and said you will be fine Mum you have caught it early on, my 16 year old soon was more emotional and had a cry in his bedroom. I was very positive with them both saying Mum will be fine and if they have any questions ask me or if they want to talk to someone or have time out they can speak to their dad or their Auntie (my sister) as I do worry about my daughter holding in her feelings.  I may email their head of years tomorrow just so they are aware and extra support for them. My son bless him starts his GCSE’s next week but sure he will be fine. My other concern is my parents who are 72 and 71 even though they are very active and young hearted it has devastated them and I feel awful for them having to go through it with me. Zoe xx

Thanks for your reply, yes it’s funny what children think. I hope you get a cover story. Take care xx

Hi Zoe,

I am so sorry to hear of all that you have been going through. I have had 2 bouts of breast cancer the first was 9 years ago, when I had a lumpectomy followed by Tamoxifen. When I developed another lump in the same breast a year later, I had a double mastectomy, followed by letrozole for 6 years. I stopped taking this in July 2017.

I understand your anxiety following this latest diagnosis, but you are just as well to discover it now, before it becomes more established. I hope that your CT scan on Friday goes well. Please don't worry about needing a mastectomy. I was unable to have reconstruction, due to previous non-cancerous surgery, which had ruled out the usual donor sites.

I still manage to go swimming and to the gym by using different prostheses and, nobody would notice the difference, unless I am bare naked. Fortunately, my hubby is just glad that I am still here and, is more interested in having me here regardless of how I look on the surface. The person on the inside hasn't changed and that is the important point.

You are as well to tell your 2 children soon, as you don't want them to overhear something that they shouldn't before you've told them. Just a simple explanation will do. They don't need chapter and verse.

I hope that all goes well for you. Please keep in touch and let us know how you get on. We are always here for you.

Kind regards,

Jolamine xx

Hi Jolamine

Thank you so much for your kind words. You sound like a very positive and inspirational woman. I am still in shock to be honest and feel like I am talking about someone else this is happening to. I am very lucky I have an amazing family and very supportive friends, I will take this on and fight it for my children’s, my parents, my sister and neice and nephew’s sake. 

I will hopefully post positive news next week after my CT scan.

Thank you for sharing your story with me and hope all is well with you now.

Zoe xx

Hi Zoe,

It would be a good idea to let the children's teachers know too, so they can keep a lookout for anything untoward at school.

I am glad to hear that you have such amazing family and friends to support you. You gave a lovely long list of all the people you are taking this head on for. One important person was missing from that list and that was YOU. As mums, we are all guilty of looking after everyone else and, forgetting about ourselves. This is one time when you have to put yourself first.

I agree that your diagnosis must have hit your mum and dad very hard too, but I'm glad that they have one another to support, as you all travel this cancer journey together.

I look forward to some positive news following your CT scan next week.

Kind regards,

Jolamine xx