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My dad has oesophageal cancer

Claire4848
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Hi, my dad has recently been diagnosed with oesophageal cancer (a few weeks ago).

I am struggling to cope with the news. We have just had positive news that the cancer hasn't spread so he will shortly be starting chemotherapy and they are planning to operate.

I am 25 and work full-time which I am finding difficult. My mum and dad don't live too far away but I just want to be there and not at work (which I know isn't possible).

I would just be grateful for some coping tips. Also, I don't know much about chemotherapy and the operation and want to know as much as possible.

Thanks.

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    Hi Claire , 

    im sorry to read your post if you read mine it sounds like we are in a very similar situation , my parents don’t live near me I’m trying to get them closer but go to see them as much as I can , my dad is starting chemotherapy I to know nothing about chemotherapy, in regards coping I’m struggling I have good and bad days I’ve very angry with the world but try not to show it to my dad I go and visit him as much as I can , stay positive I front of him try to keep things light hearted and enjoy as much time as we have for together making memories ,

    feel free to contact me if you want 

    x

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    Hi Claire

    im sorry to hear of your Dads diagnosis, it is very good news that it hasn’t spread

    i have stomach cancer so not the same but same kind of area, I had my stomach removed 3 weeks ago and have had chemo before surgery and will have more in a few weeks. 

    A great source of information in the Oesophageal Patients Association site, they have lots of downloads and information. They also have a forum on the health unlocked   site, you just need to search for the oesophageal community, there’s so many people there years post surgery who can give brilliant advice. 

    Good luck to your Dad and family, the early days are the hardest but you will get through it.

    xxx

     

  • Offline in reply to Harper79

    Hello,

    Thank you for your reply. I have read your post and I am really sorry to hear what you're going through too.

    I guess all we can do is make the most of now as we don't know what is going to happen next. I think that is one of the hardest things, not knowing.

    All the best to you and your family.

    x

  • Offline in reply to Mikeswife

    Hello,

    Thank you for your reply. I am so sorry to hear about what you are going through. I hope you make a full recovery and treatment hasn't been too horrible for you.

    I will definitely have a look at that website, thank you for the tip.

    Good luck to you too. I am glad to hear that things will get easier and that the early days are hardest.

    xxx

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    Hello Claire4848,

     

    It's an unfortunate situation, but it is better to look always for the positive side. This is a marathon, not a race, so you will have to have patience. And with time may your dad get better.

    I'm also 25 years-old worker, and my boyfriend who has cancer lives 2h from my city, so we see each other on weekends. Probably you feel like me that we are too damn young to deal with such overwhelming problems... I'm from Portugal, and I had to move to a new city for a job, so I was feeling super lonely here (still feel sometimes). I started to go to a counsellor. Here they have Liga Portuguesa Contra o Cancro, which is an institution that provides among other things, free psychological consultations for both the patients and family, which is very nice. Maybe you could benefit from something similar?
    Because I felt I couldn't talk with many people, going to conselleur help me a lot, even if it was just to validate my emotions, that I was not crazy to feel sad and that I was doing my best to have a good life, despite the circunstances.

    Sometimes i also vent with friends, and during the journey I was surprised by people that I trusted that hurted me, and people with whom I had less intimacy that provided a lot of support. 

    Take each day at a time, take care of yourself and acknowledge your feelings. I'm here if you need.

    Best of luck to your dad*

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