Mastectomy tomorrow and I'm panicking

Well, just as it says in the title I'm struggling today. I've just got back from having the radiation injection to locate the sentinel node and I think that's made it all feel a bit real. I know I have no choice but to have the op and I know all the odds are in my favour but I'm terrified .

My lovely breast nurse said the anaesthetist my surgeon works with is lovely and will make my morning as chilled out as it can be so I can ask for no more than that but I'm still panicking. 

I feel physically sick and as though my head is exploding - no pain just a sort of fizzing, fuzzy sensation. I think it's just my body trying to cope. 

I don't really have any questions just wanted to rant a little.

  • Rant away!  Feel free to have a rant here any time you want.  Do you have someone - a good friend or relation to be by your side as you go through all this (I mean this literally as well as mentally although I realise she cannot stand beside you while the mastectomy is carried out).  Someone to hold your hand in the nervous waiting and to be there with you afterwards?  I hope you can find someone to do this for you. Let us know afterwards how you are.  Annie

  • Annie, thank you for replying. I'm very lucky to have a lovely family who are right beside me and will be there waiting tomorrow.  My daughter's 21 and she's been my rock through this. In fact were about to have a go at making a plaster cast of my bust!

    Well have a giggle and I'll feel better.

    Xxx

  • Hi Dahlia

    i am not as far on in my journey but I truly feel for you. Be strong and take care. I too have a wonderful daughter who keeps me smiling and sane. 

    C x

  • Dahlia, I feel for you as I went through the same before my op. It was a wonderful feeling though to wake up knowing another milestone was passed. 

    I did the plaster casting too and so pleased I did, though I had a hellish time removing all the Vaseline from my body. Unexpected challenges!

    All the best for tomorrow, will be thinking of you x

  • Hello I'm still here!

    I was honestly terrified going into the op but I woke up and I'm here. Anaesthetic didn't agree with me and I was very sick until Thursday but it's done. 

    I've cut down on painkillers and been moving my arm and shoulder a lot. I've just washed my hair and had a shower so feeling a bit more human.

    I don't like looking down and seeing my fat tum as it's no longer hidden by my boob. And I'm comedically lopsided but managing to laugh about it at the moment.

    The surgeon was pleased with everything so that's as much as I can ask really. I have clinic on Tuesday and will find out then when pathology results will be in.

    My family have been fab and I feel very lucky to have their support. 

    Xxx

  • Thanks for coming back to give us an update.  Sorry you had a bad reaction to the anaesthetic but glad you are getting over it now.  Just take things easy and don't be surprised if you are a bit tearful at the loss of your boob.  You are still you and have done what was necessary and although I don't know you am impressed by how well you are taking this.  Good on you.  Annie

  • Annie I really expected to be more tearful to be honest.  I think it'll come but not yet. I just so grateful to have got through the op. I'm making the most of being laid up I promise you - I've had lots of drinks made for me and I get to chose what films/box sets to watch.

    I'm looking forward to getting properly back on my feet . I'm not looking forward to working out how to wear a bra all over again - I've been swinging free since the op but I'm not sure how much longer my family can stand that as there's quite a lot to swing! 

    Thank you for your kind words and for thinking of me

    Xx