Hi Abbie, my dad (78) was diagnosed with cancer in April, stage 4. He didn't want any treatment and took the news in his stride, I on the other hand fell apart. Months on and I watch him fading away on a daily basis hoping the end comes sooner than later as it is heart breaking to watch my hero drop 6 stone in 6 months, he's frail and loosing his mobility and independence but fights a hard battle every day. My brother (56) was diagnosed 2 months ago also with stage 4 but has chosen to have every treatment available. My whole world is falling apart but I still get up every day and get on, you must do the same. Cry, scream or write it down but it's not about you, that will come later, when you can focus on you. Right now you need to focus on your dad and the family. I'm sorry if this is not what you want to hear but it will help you focus on the hear and now. I too thought about "what am I going to do without him" but right now you do have him and as my dad said to me " there will be plenty of time for crying later". Take care of yourself and the rest will follow.