How do they know

Please all. My father has been diagnosed with stage 4 cancer and given 14-15 months. How can they do that!? How do they predict how long you have!? 

I have been reading all of the other discussions and see so much sameness and understanding in the words. I am so sorry we are all here struggling through this hurt and seeing your family member struggle, hurt, and fade in front of you. 

  • Evening 

    Im sorry you and your family are going through such an awful time, I do understand your dismay at their flippant prognosis.

    My sister inlaw was diagnosed with Pancreatic Cancer in November last year and was given two months, we were angry that it felt like they wrote her off! I dont know how they calculate it, I assume it’s to do with growth.

    She defied them but staying with us for four months, that’s how she was always, never being told to do anything, even defying nurses who told he to get into bed.

    I don’t know if this helps.

    Just wanted to say I understand your pain.

    Ems x

     

  • I'm so sorry to hear about your father's recent diagnosis and

    wish you and your family well in the coming months. I don't know how the doctors arrive at their timelines. My own mum was diagnosed with lung cancer last Wednesday and I'm still in shock. She has agreed with the doctors no treatment or vice versa and they have given her a few months. We're not sure what stage she is at. But, her first clinic appointment clicks in next week, two weeks after the cancer was confirmed. Hopefully we'll know more then. 

    It's all so unknown. On a good note can I just say that I lost my dad at Christmas last year. He didn't have cancer, but he had a lengthy illness. The Macmillan nursing staff were absolutely wonderful. Not only there for my dad but for mum and other family members too. I take comfort from the care and love he was given by the Macmillan nurses in life and their kindness to the family and to dad on his death. 

    I take comfort in knowing how well they controlled dad's pain relief and if mum should go that route with pain then I know they will do their utmost to control it. 

    I'm finding it difficult to think about how to survive the strain of the next few months and I'm sure it's every bit as difficult with 14/15 months. Neither is long enough. 

    Kindest regards