Hi Colin,

I find I just tell people. Random taxi drivers, any relative, old friends that I may contact etc. I'm quite open about all my ailments and take an interest in the ailments of others who I speak to.

Many times people will ask 'How are you', when you meet them, generally expecting a non-committal 'Ok'. I tell 'em and go into as much detail as the situation calls for.

I'm in the lucky situation where i have a cognitive impairment which means I don't care about having cancer or the other stuff I've got, so talking about it doesn't phase me at all. And being so open about it may render it not so frightening to others and allow them to talk about it. Many people are so frightened of offending a cancer sufferer that they cease contact, whereas openness makes everything easier.

For example, if I see someone with a false leg, I'll ask them about it, show an interest. Being disabled/ill can be very isolating so I make the effort where I can. I once had a lady in my taxi who talked for about an hour and a half. She had cancer, her husband had cancer and kept stabbing himself, she was a carer for her mentally ill daughter . . . everyone of her family was either seriously ill or falling apart in some way but she seemed very blase about it all. In the end we were both in hysterics.

For me, everything is about how I feel at this moment in time.

I've no idea if anything I've said can be of any help and I appear to be burbling somewhat now, so I'll just wish you the best.

Regards

Taff

I am with Taff on this one; tell anyone who so much as asks how you are doing.  They should not have asked if they did not want to know the answer!  Put yourself in their position.  How many times do we ask someone how they are expecting a mumbled "fine" and on to the next subject.  Just tell them; maybe if real friends they will want to know all about it and even go out of their way to help in any way they can.  It is not something to be ashamed of although some people seem to think it might be contagious and back off!  It is the most important thing that is happening to you at this time and you should not shy away from saying so.  You can judge by their reaction how good a friend they are!    Having said all of that, I am sorry that you have had this horrible diagnosis and hope that you are getting some good medical help.  Annie