Dear Chrissie, thank you, your words mean the world to me. You’re quite right, doesn’t matter what the type of cancer is, the waiting, the imaginings, the fear are all horrible. I have been on anti depressants at times in my life but found they take about a week to have any effect. I’m trying to live moment to moment, enjoying my cup of tea as I write this, making the most of, right now, being pain and symptom free. Also trying to be brave for my poor husband, who is worried to death and trying so hard to be brave. Friday will certainly be worse for him. Ill be unconscious. Love, Caroline. Xx

Hi there Caggie. Just wanted to stop by and wish you good luck for today. A relative of mine was also told that a mass she had on a kidney was in all probabilty cancerous so she also had surgery to remove it. When the path results came back it was benign.  

Dear Rileyroo, thank you! I’m going to hold on to that beautiful word, Benign. Love and thanks to you. X

Hang on to what ever gets you through this. It will only grind you down if you let it!

Hay there ... I can see your sense of humour, still there ... it's o.k to feel scared, and yet smile at things ... if you can do it all, take those feelings,run with them, whatever they are ...and hold on together ... you can share tears, fears, and yet something might just strike you as funny ... like you being more worried bout hubby, because you'll be knocked out ... those thoughts will give you, what you need to do this ... when it's over, you'll look back and wonder how you did it ... and be proud that no matter how scared you were, you faced it, head on ...

And like Rilley said, there's a chance it's o.k ...  my mum had a throat growth years ago... after her op, I went with her, and the surgeon told her it was benign ... she started crying, when l asked her why ... she thought that meant cancer ... her face when l told her, it wasn't is still implanted in my mind ...

So hold on lass, just talk to your hubby, and get him onside, being positive, but knowing it's o.k to feel scared too ...  you can walk this journey. .. TOGETHER !! 

You know, it's been a pretty good day! The sun is shining, always helps. I've been gardening. I'm a rubbish gardener and we only have a patio so mainly pots and I expect everyhing will die but it looks great now. I've had heaps of lovely messages from friends and I just feel, I'm here, right now i'm feeling good and that will do. I may well be a quivering mass of jelly in ten minutes but I wanted to share my up times with you lovely people too.

Hi there ... can just picture you in your little balcony garden, sipping wine ... and you've got the summer to do it ... I used to have plastic flowers in my garden, coz real ones died in days ... and didn't need weeding, or watering ... and just a quick wash down with a hose and they did the next year too ...  ; ))  

Any time you wanna chat, vent, or share a thought, wer always here ... Chrissie x

Hi!!! Glad to know you have gotten great replies from this group. Found this group when the rollercoaster was going to fast and couldn't hear myself scream. 

Still having test done to know for sure, feeling alone at time but to open up this site and see all the responses to each other makes me feel better. Hugs for you!!!

Morning Caggie. It’s a lovely forecast for the next few days. Enjoy some you time and just think that by this time next week you’ll be starting your recovery from the op! The next week will fly by as you sort out the stuff you want to get done before Friday.