Hi there and a warm welcome to Cancer Chat.

I am so sorry to hear about your wife's diagnosis and how this has affected the entire family. Sadly cancer doesn't only affect the patient, but can be extremely stressful for family members too.

Both of my parents, several family members and close friends have died from different types of cancer. Now it's my turn - not to die, but to have cancer. I have had 2 bouts of breast cancer. The first was 8 years ago and the second was 7. I had a lumpectomy the first time followed by Tamoxifen. Second time around I had a double mastectomy ad then took Letrozole for 6 years. I finished taking this last July.The surgeon wanted me to have radiotherapy after my first operation, but due to procedural errors, this never happened. This means that I cannot help you with any information about chemo or radiotherapy.

I have quite a number of side-effects after the hormone therapy. I attend a lymphoedema clinic every 12 weeks and get manual lymphatic drainage and bandaging for 2 weeks in every 12. During this period I look like the Michelin man! On my last visit to the clinic my nurse advised me to get a mole on my back investigated too. I have an appointment to see a dermatologist in the latter part of this month.

Try not to dwell on this as if it were the end. Do you know what type of breast cancer your wife has, or what stage it is?  The lower the stage (usually from 1-4), the better the chances are for her. I have experienced a huge change in cancer treatment and aftercare since my mum had it. Years ago people died with cancer, now so many more are living with it and, I am doing my best to do this too!

Try to support your wife as best you can. Try to make memories with the family. Are there places or people that she might like to visit.You will probably find that she gets very tired. If this is the case, let her rest as much as she needs to. Can you accompany her to all of her appointments? It is a great help to have someone with her. It is also a good idea to draw up a list of questions before each appointment. It is also a good idea for you to write down the answers whilst you wife is asking the questions. It is amazing how much you forget before you've left the hospital grounds! As a family, you will all find it helpful if you can keep communication channels open and discuss all parts of her cancer openly between you.

Please keep in touch and let us know how you all get on. We are always here for you whenever you want to talk.

Kind regards,

Jolamine

Hello. Please pass on my best wishes to your wife as she starts her treatment. I too live in the U.K. and was recently diagnosed with secondary breast cancer in the bones and have been on IBRANCE along with Letrozole ( I’m post menopausal) for four months and doing ok so far, with monthly bloods and tumour markers being within the normal range and my ct scan due in a couple of months . My advice is to remain positive , eat healthy, get exercise through walking and drink sufficient water . I have so far had minimal side effects and just rest when tired . But so far, so good and it’s also inspiring to see many people who have been on this medication in the US for more than 2 years getting promising results (I follow their stories on the HealthUnlocked website) .

Hi

I wonder how your wife is doing now?

My mother has had the same diagnosis. May I ask - is your wife being treated on the NHS, or privately?

Best wishes