Hi sounds like you been through slot .I'm fairly new I'm 60 was diagnosed bowel cancer in august scan showed it had spread to liver have not started any treatment yet .am seeing oncologist tomorrow to discuss chemotherapy.i. Have been referred to liver specialist at another hospital so when time come I think I will go there for operation and back to my local hospital for bowel op.i find night times worst don't sleep much .my hubby is very good but very scared and I have try keep him calm .I am now starting to experience pain so need see doc find out what's to help.. hospital and McMillan have given so many books to read bit overwhelmed so I haven't bothered.i have been off work since diagnosed so got lot the home and time to think.we went to councillig one day from McMillan was ok chap was very good haven't been since ..think I'll probably need phychiatrist at end of this .good luck with treatment