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Should I let myself hope?

Froggy28
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I'm 30 years old. I am a wife and a mother to  three year old boy.I fell in December and hurt my breast. Since then I've experienced pain. I finally went to the doctor who couldn't feel anything 'nasty' but referred me to the breast clinic as he noticed a prominent vein. 

Fast forward to yesterday. 

I went to my appointment alone. I was not worried. I had been told this was a routine 'just to be safe' check. After an initial examination an ultrasound of the area was ordered. On here they found something they didn't like the look of so I was sent to have a mammogram (what fun they are!). I was then sent back for another ultrasound and biopsy. 

Back to the consultant. I knew as soon as I entered the room and there were more than the normal amount of people that this obviously wasn't going well.

'It looks like breast cancer'

'it's early'

'its treatable'

??? How was this happening?? I was only there for a vein. They found a hidden 3cm lump.

the way the conversation went was as if he was telling me I have it and the biopsy results are just a formality. He would rather be 'frank'.

My question: Should I let myself hope that there's a chance that this could still all be fine? Or does the nature of the consultation tell me that the results are simply a formality?

 

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    Hi Froggy,

    Welcome to Cancer Chat. I am sorry to hear about the shock you got yesterday. It sounds as if your  consultant was pretty sure that this is cancer. They usually have a good idea, although they nearly always confirm it with ultrasound, mammogram and a biopsy. There is always the chance that all is still fine, but I fear that this is only a slim chance.

    I have had primary breast cancer for 7 years and developed a second primary in the same breast about 6 years ago. I always take someone with me to my appointments in case there is bad news. I also draw up a list of questions and take this with me to every appointment too. It is all too easy to forget to ask pertinent questions in the heat of the moment. It is also often difficult to recall what was said by the time I reach the hospital gates after consultation.

    I shall be thinking of you tomorrow and praying for a good outcome.

    Please keep us in the loop. Remember that we are always here for you whenever you feel like talking.

    Kind regards,

    Jolamine xx

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    Yes, the consultant feels very sure, unfortunately. Miserable news, especially when you are only 30 and with a young child. But one positive thing from your entire story is that you may have been lucky to have had that fall in December. Otherwise you may have remained blissfully unaware until had symptoms much later. But instead you get to hear the word  "early" which is much better than some of the alternatives. I was "early" as well and it cheers me up when my next check up  approaches and my anxiety levels rise. "Early" means that it is highly unlikely to come back in my case. Let's hope that this is case for you too. Best wishes. Harry.

  • Offline in reply to Harry2
    I was also found to have 'it' very early. Consultant said it would have been 2-3 years before it even became a problem (I'm a lot older than you tho and mine was picked up on routine mammogram). I've had a lumpectomy and am waiting to start radiotherapy treatment. I'm technically cancer free but also having hormone therapy as well to try and prevent a recurrence. The biopsy results are important as they will show if it is invasive or not, that result will also determine your treatment plan aka plan of attack!
  • Offline in reply to Jolamine
    Thank you for your honesty. Everything feels a bit surreal at the moment. Just want to get to Friday to know one way or the other.
  • Offline in reply to Froggy28
    It will do, as will Friday when you get your results but certainty is a wonderful thing; you can start to get your head around what is to come whatever that is to be. Take some one with you if you can, I was OK with the actual results bit, it was the getting home part I struggled with. Take a list of any questions you have and ask more questions if you don't understand the answers. Ask who ever goes along with you to write the answers if possible so you can go back over them later. Easy for me to say now, but I found the surgery bit pretty easy, done as a day patient. Uncomfortable for a few days afterwards but nothing more. Get in touch if you want to talk more. I'll be as honest as I can.
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    Hi Froggy,

    Welcome to the forum.

    This is all a lot for you to take in at once but you should take hope from the fact that you were told "it's early" and "it's treatable". There is still a slight chance that the biopsy will contradict the consultant's words, but it would be unusual for them to go out on a limb if they weren't pretty sure.

    Best wishes and good luck with the biopsy results.
    Dave.

     

     

     

  • Offline in reply to Froggy28

     

    Hi Froggy,

    Am I right in saying that you had your hospital appointment yesterday? - I hope that all went well.

    Look forward to hearing from you/

    Regards,

    Jolamine xx

  • Offline in reply to Jolamine

    My appointment is Friday the 15th. The above happened on Wednesday, so have the 10 day wait to contend with. Limbo until then I guess. Never felt so not in control before. 

    Im appreciative of the supportive messages from everyone. They have definitely helped. Still can't believe I didn't ask if they could be wrong when I was at the hospital - my mind went totally blank and couldn't think! They did say they wouldn't discuss treatment until then so don't know what to expect. 

    Xx

     

     

  • Offline in reply to Froggy28

     

    Hi Froggy,

    I think that we all feel a loss of control when cancer takes over. It seems to rule us rather than us ruling it. Everything happens so quickly that it just takes us over. I would have thought that you should have all results before you go for surgery.

    To prevent you from forgetting important questions, I suggest that you draw up a list of questions for your consultant between your appointments. I print two copies of this – one for me and one for my hubby who always comes with me. He writes down the answers, which is a great help. We not only forget the questions to ask, but also forget a large proportion of the answers given by the time we reach the hospital dates. Many of us do this , so your consultant won’t be at all surprised if you do this.

    I hope that all goes well on 15th. Try to keep hold of what your consultant said – ‘early’ and ‘treatable’ are about as good as it gets. I hope that your tests prove this to be the case.

    Kind regards,

    Jolamine xx

  • Offline in reply to Jolamine
    It is breast cancer. I was prepared for this outcome though so was able to remain calm today. Have an MRI on Tuesday and another appointment on Friday to discuss treatment. Hopefully the last biopsy result will be back by then xxx

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