Thanks Harry, Had missed that you had replied. You are right! And so far we have been lucky that it all was taken so seriously and not dismissed as a food intolerance. Its just the word "cancer". You can not get away from it, however it is said, it still means the same thing, its serious! 

I`m glad you are in recovery, and i pray to god Charlie is in your position in a few months time. And you are completely correct there are great treatment plans out there, so so so lucky again is Charlie has private medical insurance (i do not nor do my boys) so as of now his care has been spot on. Never take health for granted. Thanks for taking the time to message me, i really appreciate it x

You're very welcome, Charlotte. And one big positive Charlie has compared to 'my' penile cancer is that colorectal cancer is a more common form of the disease. Which means that it is much better understood, and there are more specialists in this field. Penile cancer specialists are as rare as hen's teeth, so it is really important to find one with proven experience on the field. Charlie will get superb medical care for colorectal cancer, whether NHS or private.

You said that Charlie was upset by bad stuff he found on internet. And yes, the worst possible cases are grim, no getting round that. It is easy to just say 'hold the thought that these worst cases are unlikely', but I know all to well that this is easier said than done. In my case, I had to have a few lymph nodes removed for checking. I knew in advance that I had a 20% chance of bad news. Waiting for those results was hell on earth. And even now, my routine 3 month follow up appointments, which include ultrasound  of my lymph nodes in the groin, are stressful. And nothing is going to make that stress go away completely. But Charlie clearly has great love and support from you, as I did and still do from my wife, and this is wonderful to see.

I had heard of colorectal cancer, my whole family is medical so have been aware of these things all my life. But never in a million years did i think it would affect me or my family!!! I even said to my sister a few weeks ago that i was so lucky that cancer never affected me, i mean i am 1 of 6 children, and my sons are number 12 and 15 grandchild, we now have number 17 grandchild on the way. This is just my family!! No one has had anything major happen. I feel like me now saying that sparked this somehow (i know, i know crazy talk) but its hard to not think how on earth has this happened, what did we do.

As for Charlie, he is ok, i would say his symptoms are getting worse, only in a few short days. Is this because of the colonoscopy, or because they generally are getting worse. He is going to the toilet more, there is more pressure to go, and after food he gets unsettled, not sick, but an unsettled tummy. I wonder if this is the disease getting worse? You read horror stories of really rare aggressive forms, and i`m petrified this is one of them. Or is it that now he is diagnosed we are aware of every little ache and pain. Next friday with the consultant can not come quick enough. I need to know what we are up against, i need to know what the treatment will be. 

And thankyou i love this man very much. We met a little later in life, after a few failed relationships, so have only been married 3 years this year, and together 6 years. He is one of the most amazing men i know (my dad and brothers are the other ones). He is calm, collected and caring. But also arrogant and quick witted, which i like, as need to be kept on my toes. Hes handsome, and condfident, he works out 5 days a week so is in great shape, specifically weight lifting. And he is a fantastic father, my two boys adore him. He is in charge of all the rough and tumble play, and letting them get dirty and climb things they are not allowed by me. i am very glad you have the support of your wife also! I will always be here for Charlie, what ever happens after friday. 

Thankyou Tracey, your words have made me feel better since i started all this. Horrible to know others have the same disease, but also nice to know we are not alone. 

We have just got in from swimming with the boys, such a great time, and for about an hour cancer did not come into conversation. Hope you are having a good weekend x

So glad to hear you had a little bit of normality,

and fun , the one thing this had taught me is to appreciate every day , enjoy the rest of your weekend 

luvnhugs x

Hi to both of you. I have been following your conversation and am pleased that you have found each other. The unbearable feeling of loneliness is almost too much to bear. My husband has got appointments tomorrow and Tuesday and will get his diagnosis at the end of the week , maybe beginning of the following week. We already know that he has lung cancer but that is all we know at the moment. I cannot believe that this happening. Much love to you both. 

Christine xx

Hello Christine , instantly bought tears to my eyes reading your post, my heart goes out to you , the waiting is an unbearable time ,all  our emotions running high ,I have grown up children who have all been there for us  and off course my gorgeous husband,but I truly have never felt so alone  , I can't keep telling Geoff how scared I am of losing him for obvious reasons But that's the bottom line he is my world and I'm terrified ,

please keep us updated  with how you and your husband are getting on,

or even just to offload,  

hugs  

Tracey x

Christine, this wait is truely awful isn`t it!!!and it is so very lonely. We have chosen not to tell many people, only my parents and Charlies parents. My sister and one good girlfriend too, as i will need help with childcare, a 1yr old and a 3 yr old should not be in a hospital, esp during tests for cancer.  My 3 yr old understands things now,and i`m worried he will pick up on it. I have also told my brother. He lives in Austrailia, but is a consultant aneasthetist, and trained in London, so has a lot of contacts. I asked him to look into Charlies consultant, check his credentials out, and also he has offered to contact a collegue to give a second opinion. I`m very greatful i have a medical family, but also it is a hindrance in that i know how serious this all is. 

I`m sorry to hear your husband has lung cancer, what a truely awful disease this is!! Has he been unwell long? We will get our diagnosis at the same time, so please let me know how you get on. Like i have said before i am not religious but i will be praying that both our men get the best possible result!! 

Thank you both for your kind replies. I felt quite positive yesterday but today I am the complete opposite. My husband has had a few chest infections over the last 3 months and finally was sent for an X-ray. A scan followed within 2 days. It was only last Thursday that we got the results of the scan and since then have seen the consultant and have appointments for. PET scan and a biopsy over the next 2 days. 

We have grown up children, a son and daughter and 5 beautiful grandchildren. We have told our children but have kept everything normal for the little ones. The eldest is 11 and will be going to secondary school in September , he is a big worry for us as he worships his grandad. We always holiday with them and are due to fly abroad on Saturday next but that is a huge decision we need to make under guidance from the consultant. 

Trying to get myself in a better place for our long couple of days ahead at the hospital. I too am terrified of losing my darling husband, we should be looking forward to celebrating our Ruby Wedding Anniversary in November. I can't think that far ahead at the moment. 

Will let you know how we go in London. 

Much love to you all. 

Christine. Xx