My name is Sarah, I'm 22 from Livingston, West Lothian and my dad has just been diagnosed with Colon Cancer and we are struggling immensely to process this heartbreaking, unexpected news. I've been his carer for the last 7 years since he had the stroke in 2010 and there was never a day that went by where I left his side for anything (unless I was working). My dad is such a loving, caring and generally funny man but receiving this diagnosis threw him off the edge a little, as it did with everyone in our immediate family. I'm sure you will all agree, that being told to think positively while your loved one undergoes several blood transfusions and operations to remove cancerous tumours, it's hard and nobody does quite understand the emotional/physical stress you endure as your brain sends you spinning as you try your hardest to take in what you've just been told from the nurses up at MAU Ward. Nobody understands the intensity of the thoughts swimming round in your head fearing "he's gonna die", nobody ever tells you the truth when you want to know because they're afraid of hurting you more emotionally and they don't know if you can prepare yourself to deal with more pain than what you're currently dealing with. Nobody gets you. You feel so alone, isolated with no-one to talk to but a lingering shadow that smells like your loved ones aftershave and you're craving their attention, desperate for them to acknowledge you, let alone smile at you and remember who you are to them. It sucks. CANCER SUCKS!
I've had to take a few days off work to find out what plan will be put in place after surgery praying with all my strength that he pulls through, yet while dying inside myself a small part of me fears he won't be coming home.
So, over the next few weeks or however long my DAD may have left, I'm going to be using this site for updates to help me come to terms with his diagnosis. Please keep us in your prayers. Thank you.
Sarah
