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Needing a little support please

tiredmum
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My ex husband was told he had fybrosis late last month, on Monday this week he felt unwell and as his appt was in February my son took him to his GP on Tues morning, GP rang for an ambulance, he was taken to hospital and they diagnosed sepsis, he then went for a scan and has been told he has lung cancer which has spread to his liver and bones, he is 55, he is currently in hospital and will be allowed out for a few hours on Christmas day then back to have a biopsy, he is on oxygen and 2 drips. This has all happened so fast.

My son is my eldest and is devastated, please can anyone help explain what will happen next, I went to see ex today and he looks so poorly, my son is clinging to the hope that the biopsy may show the cancer can be treated, I have to say I am not so optomistic.

I am feeling quite helpless right now and would really appreciate any suggestions of how to cope with all of this for my sons sake and I suppose mine too I have known my ex for 40 years as we grew up in the same village,

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    Has your ex been allocated a Macmillan named nurse ? As they are good people to advise you and your son x 

  • Offline in reply to Abc
    Hi, thank you for replying, no not as far as I know, it has all happened so fast, he was going to come out of hospital for a few hours tomorrow but isnt up to it as he needs oxygen constantly. The hardest part of tomorrow will be for my son to take his 8 year old son to see his grandad who he adores. My ex hs decided on only having pain relief and my son to his credit respects that, not going to be easy at all x
  • Offline in reply to tiredmum

    Hi, I would have to say it's not going to be easy at all in the coming weeks. I have just joined this forum and my wife passed away on Thursday this week so it is all very raw and the time of year makes it harder. 

    Take care and try to make the most of the time you have. 

    Jeff

  • Offline in reply to Jeff-lostinnorthyorkshire

    Hi Jeff, I am so sorry to hear your news, my deepest condolences to you, I hope you have some support from family and friends, this time of year seems to amplify everything not that there is ever a good time to lose a loved one.

    Thank you so much for taking the time to reply to my post, the news here is not good he is deteriorating so fast, I am just hoping for tomorrow to be bearable for everyone particulalry my little grandson.

    Please take care.

    Lynn

     

  • Offline in reply to tiredmum

    My ex husband died tonight, how cruel on Christmas day.

    My son is devastated as are we all.

    I dont know what to do

  • Offline in reply to tiredmum

    So sorry for you. It's certainly not going to be easy as you can probably imagine. I have no words which will make it better. If you take a look at my first post "looking for something" there's a poem which is in the bereavement pack we got from the hospital which sums the situation to a tee. 

    Take care 

    Jeff

  • Offline in reply to Jeff-lostinnorthyorkshire

    Thank you Jeff

    I cant stop crying, it is such a shock.

    I did read your poem earlier

    I have to go to work today not sure how that will go

    I sincerely hope you and your children have the best day that you can x

  • Offline in reply to tiredmum
    Hi, I'm new to this site & I'm currently in the awful process of awaiting biopsy results myself. After reading your posts I would just like to say that you are definitely not alone at this time as I'm sure all those who have also read your posts will certainly have you in their thoughts & prayers especially at this time of the year. I hope & pray you can find the strength to move forward knowing you are not alone & that there are always people (often unknown) wishing you & your family well especially at this very difficult time. God bless you. SG
  • Offline in reply to SG

    Hi SG

         I do hope that things go well for you xxx

    It is so kind of you to reply to my post, I just cant take in what has happened in such a short time frame

    I am so proud of my son, he has spent all night and today ringing people to let them know what has happened, my grandson is for today oblivious and another reason I am proud of my son and his partner, my grandon came here and was so happy to tell me that grandad bought him an xbox1 for Christmas which he had instructed my son to do for him on the day he went into hospital.

    I am just sat here reflecting on having known my ex for 40 years

    The kindness of strangers has touched my life before and it is a powerful thing xxx

  • Offline in reply to tiredmum

    Hi Tiredmum,

    I am so sorry to hear this sad news - my heart goes out to you and your dear son.

    Hugs. x

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