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30 year old, mum diagnosed, am I selfish?

HandyT1
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First time post on here. Can't sleep. 

I'm 30, have a new born daughter and an incredibly happy home life with my fiancé of 8 years. 

Mum came round today unannounced and told me she had something to tell me, she's been for an ultra sound, mammogram and biopsy today and been told 99% breast cancer. We're to wait until Friday for the results and what the next steps are. I feel like my world has fallen down around me, it is the strangest feeling I have ever experienced. 

Am I overreacting? Is this too early to be upset? Do I have the right to be upset, considering there is nothing wrong with me? Am I too old to feel like this, do I need to "suck it up"?

Im sorry, these are ramblings, I know.  I'm not even really sure why I'm posting this in an Internet forum, nor do I even know what I expect anyone to say to this. 

Thanks for letting me rant, sorry. 

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    NOPE. You are not selfish. You are not overreacting. You have a right to be upset.

    I am 26 and my dad told us he has prostate cancer on June 22. Two weeks later, we found out it was advanced prostate cancer. BUT when I found out for the first time he had prostate cancer, I cried for almost two days straight. Everytime I saw him or talked to him, I would start crying. I think it's completely normal. I don't know if you're the same but I hadn't really started thinking about my parent's mortality before this. I would think about it now and again, but now that my dad's mortality is staring me in the face, this is the must devastating and scariest feeling in the world. I remember for the first week or so, I would wake up with the heaviest feeling on my chest and thought I was going to die because I couldn't breathe. Some days are okay, some days I just want to cry. You can have your space and cry, but try not to dwell in it. Try to live in the moment, and try to cherish all the time you have. 

    I truly hope that you find out your mom's cancer is curable and this is a small bump in her life's road, well, maybe not small, but hopefully this is something that can be managed and cured for her. If you need to talk I'm always here, and please do update us on your mom. I am sending all my positive thoughts your way!!!! 

  • Offline in reply to GiftThePresent

    You're absolutely right. I was not prepared in the slightest to be considering her mortality at this point. We've just had her first grandchild and were planning to have a second in a couple of years, I was whole heartedly looking forward to many years of my children having their grand mother.

    Its nice to know my reaction isn't unusual. 

  • Offline in reply to HandyT1
    Gosh no, you aren't overreacting at all. It must have been absolutely devastating to hear your Mum's new. It's awful to think of something happening to our parents, especially at a time when you all had something so positive and were enjoying. I'm so sorry to hear about your Mum and wishing you and your family, many hugs and support through this time. x

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