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Trying to stay calm

Gallbladder
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My partner was diagnosed with gall bladder cancer in November last year. He had his gallbladder removed and 2 weeks later he was asked to return to the hospital for the dreaded news. He is now on his 4th stage of chemo but what I find is when he takes the steroids for 3 days after he's so angry and can get very aggressive,verbally, which is so out of character for him. I'm trying to understand and not retaliate but I guess I'm finding it difficult. Has anyone advice for me 

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    Hi, welcome, so sorry about your partner's diagnosis.

    I haven't had chemotherapy (my choice) but I can tell you I have terrible outbursts of rage!  I think , for me,it's the knowing I can do nothing, I am frightened, I don't want to leave my loved ones - just so many things.  My husband died many years ago but I have 3 adult children.  My eldest, my son, comes to all my appointments with me and is nothing short of an angel, and yet he is the one who always bares the brunt of my anger.  I apologise all the time and then do it again.  I do wish I could stop, but he just hugs me and says not to worry.

    I have no advice really except to say many of us feel this way.  Please be patient with your partner, I am sure he would like it not to be this way. Sending you my very best wishes.

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    For goodness sake talk to his doctor! The steroids we are given are NOT supposed to have that sort of effect.

    To be frank, having been on chemo my guess is that his anger probably has nothing to do with the steroids but more to do with the physical effect of the chemo coupled with the stress of having cancer. 

    The medics may be able to adjust the level of the chemo he is taking to minimise any negative side effects and provide an assurance that the steroids aren't to blame - unless for some reason he is on anabolic steroids (unlikely as most of us are given corticosteroids), in which case they can adjust the dose!

     

    Good luck

    Dave

    ps check this page out, if you haven't already seen it www.cancerresearchuk.org/.../steroids

     

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    Hi Gallbladder

    Yes, they can have that effect.  I've just finished the FEC stage of FEC-T chemotherapy and I was sleepless and intolerant and impatient on the steroids.  And I am only expecting that to get worse on the taxotere when they double them.  Thing you have to do is recognise it and understand it, both the patient and those that care for them.  In my case, it's 3 days out of 21 and I know it happens and I explain it.  That is not the person, that is the drug.  So long as you both understand that you will cope.  

    Best of luck to both of you.

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