Hello Laura,

I know this is an old post but I could really do with someone to talk to, I've been for a coloscopy today and the doctor saw what she said was very suspicious with a high risk of it being cancer, she said there was a nasty infection there as well, she sat me down I was in total shock, she did the biopsy and said the cells just fell away, I need mri and ct to see if it has spread, I'm so frightened, the only symptoms I've had is a few spots of blood on the toilet roll, and a bit of pelvic pain , I'm frightened to death x

Hi Dawn, 

I understand that this is a frightening time but you are doing the right thing in taking care of your health. Like Minska said, cervical cancer is treatable. Take it one day, one appointment, and one treatment at a time, if it comes to that. You can do it! Let us know how you do.

Laura xx

Hi Dawn,

Yes, she did a cone biopsy (I only found that out yesterday during consultation) and she was honest in saying she was thinks it was likely cancer when I asked her at the time. It was difficult for her to say anything else when the report she saw meant she thought she was looking at a nabothian cyst before she actually performed the colposcopy. That was 22nd September. Had MRI 25th Sept, results from Biopsy & MRI 27th. So cannot fault the time frames the hospital have completed these things in. Just a shame my GP cancelled my smear tests for 6 months of last year when I rang regarding abnormal bleeding. No referral done either to gynae. My sister, who works in the medical field, is confident we would be dealing with the CIN3 had I have had my smear as scheduled last year. But what ifs don't help now. Your treatment plan will bring you positivity. Mines been discussed but I've not actually spoken with the oncologist yet. Will likely be Monday now. I'm up and down at the moment like you wouldn't believe. Message any time if you're panicking and I'll support as much as I can. Xx

@minska thank you for your supportive messages full of kindness and care. I'm very grateful our paths have crossed on this forum because you are an absolute inspiration to every single person in the same position as me right now xxx

Hi Sophie

Thank you for your kind words. Things are moving quickly for you, which is good. You’re right about the “what ifs”- we can beat ourselves up with those words, I know I did initially, but we need to try and put them out of our minds and move forward with what we need to deal with in the present. 

I hope you get to have your discussion with the oncologist on Monday to firm up plans-waiting is so difficult when you just want to get on and get started. Your feelings go up down and all over the place when you’re not in control of what’s happening, but the treatment plan gives back a bit of control to you which is the positive thing. Message me any time or ask any questions you like. Nothing is too personal or too much information for me after what I’ve had done, and I completely get the feelings you will be having. But I think you definitely will have the right attitude to deal with this head on and come out the other side.if I can be there to help and support you through as best I can, I am more than happy to do that for you. xxx

I agree with you minska is wonderful support, thank you so much xx

Thank you-those of us who have been through this just want to help and support others since we know how it all feels. xx

Hi Sophie, 

"Although this has been the most terrifying experience of my life, I felt after that appointment I had some control back. We know what it is, what we're dealing with and how we are treating it."  Yes! This is exactly how I felt! Having a plan of attack does give you some peace of mind, knowing you are working with experts that treat this every day and are there to go to battle on this cancer with you! Keep that positive attitude going! 

Laura xx

Hi Dawn,

Reading through the posts I see you did receive your results. Write down your questions and take them with you to your appointments. I kept a notebook of info, thoughts, questions, names of doctors, medications, etc. It was really helpful. I still have the notebook, 9 years later! Remember, you can do this! 

Laura xx

Good advice Laura-I wrote things down in a notebook too- when things are a bit overwhelming, it’s easy not to take everything in. I still have my notebook today! xx

Thanks Laura since my appointment on Friday I keep asking my husband what they said because I can't remember Half of it, I keep thinking about the consultants face and why she wouldn't reassure me that I was going to be ok when I told her I had hardly any symptoms, I'm driving myself mad xx

One thing I learned was not to try and interpret expressions on the consultant’s face, or dwell too much on every word and how they said it. I remember mine asking me how I was feeling when I was going through radiotherapy and when I said I felt good, he said “unfortunately that means nothing”. A throwaway remark to him, but I never forgot it and I worried about it so much. They sometimes need a lesson in bedside manner! They don’t want to commit too much or give any guarantees because they can’t, so I understand that, but my chap was never very reassuring to me! Meanwhile, we are desperately seeking reassurance all the time that everything will be ok. I’ve seen several different consultants through everything, depending on their area of expertise, and some are better than others. I really trust my current one, who was my surgeon, and feel very comfortable with her, thank goodness! xx

Woke up in absolute terror again this morning, i want to know the results of the ct scan but I'm dreading the phone ringing all night I've been waking up thinking it's gone to far and knowing it's my own fault if it has because I didnt have a smear dor 13 years, my family could have been saved from the upset there going through, I've been stupid and selfish and I'm torturing myself about that xx

Woke up in absolute terror again this morning, i want to know the results of the ct scan but I'm dreading the phone ringing all night I've been waking up thinking it's gone to far and knowing it's my own fault if it has because I didnt have a smear dor 13 years, my family could have been saved from the upset there going through, I've been stupid and selfish and I'm torturing myself about that xx

I didn’t have a smear for a lot longer than 13 years and did the torturing myself thing too. And then ignored MAJOR red flag symptoms for the best part of a year before seeing a doctor. Don’t beat yourself up about something you cannot change-you need to deal with the present rather than what has been in the past. But I do know how hard that is. I first assumed that my cancer would have spread and would be untreatable, but that was not the case at all, and my nurse was kind enough to phone me with my ct scan results to confirm no spread which was a huge relief. You are not stupid, not selfish, just unfortunate to have a cancer diagnosis, but hopefully you will get positive news with your scan results. xx

I'm trying to think if I had any symptoms but I would know if I had been in pain, I eat a lot of spicy food so I may have had stomach ache and put it down to that, ive had no bleeding and when I had my coil removed last November there were no signs of anything on the cervix then, I went to the doctors as soon as I had some blood because I thought it was a uti as the pain felt like that, can I ask what symptoms you had and ignored please xx

I ignored very bad post menopausal bleeding and extremely bad pelvic pain. So those don’t seem to apply at all in your case, which is a big positive! I should have gone to the doctor as soon as I had these symptoms, but hindsight is a wonderful thing. You went to see the doctor as soon as you thought there was an issue, so that’s also positive in getting diagnosed quickly. xx

Thank you so much for that that had made me feel a little better xx

I have seen ladies diagnosed with cervical cancer without symptoms, but it tends to be early stage. The more advanced the stage, in my experience and from speaking to many other women, the more symptoms they have, particularly pain and abnormal bleeding. Try not to get ahead of yourself before all your results are in and the stage decided on, as it’s impossible to guess and it just causes so much worry. Are you expecting a call today with the scan results? xx

She said early this week, I had the scan at 2pm on Friday so I don't know how long it takes xx

Mine was back just less than a week after the scan if I remember rightly. and it was the last piece of info needed for the MDT. We feel things move slowly but they don’t really, and all the info is needed for the MDT to make the correct treatment decision. xx