looking for any help to come to terms with my prognosis

hello - I found out I have a brain tumour  just over 4 months ago. After the surgery i was given a 12 to 18 month prognosis. I started a 6 week cycle of radio and chemo almost immediately, but the subsequent scan showed the tumor had grown. I have now started further cycles of higher dose chemo.

Physically, Ifeel well but the tumor has reduced my eyesight and that has impacted some of the things I would normally do to keep myself busy.

The prognosis was and still is a huge shock and I know I need any in-sight or help offered.  Thanks

  • Hi Gary, i am pretty new to this forum and can already see the emotional help being offered by people that really do understand. I myself was given a prognosis of no cure & prolonging life and have experienced all the emotions associated with that. I am now in the extremely blessed position to be cancer free after pretty harsh chemo and an operation. So please keep fighting and stay as upbeat as you are able to. Jos
  • Jos, so happy to hear the great outcome for you.  Thanks for posting it definitely helps me to keep on a positive track.

    Best wishes Gary

  • Hello Max

    Just wondering if you were back home from your London trip yet and if so hopefully feeling well?

    Alfie will be glad to have you home!

    Im waiting for the sun to re-appear in my part of the world and a scan on 30th after this current treatment cycle finishes. But more eagerly for the warmth of the sun on my face!

    Take care and hopefully speak soon

    Gary

  •  

    Hi Gary .... good to hear from you. Yep have had the second round of chemo and been a bit 'iffy' for a week and now starting to get back to normal.  The first week on these drugs seems to keep me on the loo for some time (much to everyones amusement in my house) but this time I have done well at 'managing' it through the drugs they gave me to bring home and being really careful with what I have eaten. They were going to stop the offending drug next cycle but I dont know if that will now change again as I coped ok. I only had a 60% dosage of it anyway - so goodness knows what would have happened with a full dose - I would have disappeared down the sewerage system I guess lol!

    How are you feeling Gary? Do you have many side effects with your treatment? I expect you are nervous about the 30th but lets hope this time that it is good news.  I too will be having a scan within the next month to see if the cyberknife treatment to my brain tumour has done any good - so we can support each other over that one!

    Its pretty cold and dull here in Suffolk too and i have arranged to walk along the sea front this afternoon with some friends.  Now wishing i hadnt cos its windy down there at the best of times - better not wear the wig, although it will give the dogs something to chase!

    How are your family?  Our daughter is getting married on the 9h May so we have that to look forward to and will get to see some family that we havent seen for a while which will be nice.  I have been doing 'the woman thing' all week about not being happy about what I am wearing -  so will have one last shopping spree at the weekend to try and find something else suitable.  I am sure I wont like that either in a few weeks time.  You guys are so lucky that you really only have the option of a suit!  I am going to do a reading at the church - havent picked one yet so if anyone has any ideas feel free to say.  Remember that I am reading it though and anything too emotional may not be a good idea cos I dont want to let the family down by blubbering!

    Sending good thoughts your way Gary - please let me know how you are when you get a moment x

  • , glad to hear the side effects  havent been too bad for you.  I finish current cycle this evening and then no more chemo tablets for 4 weeks.  I have felt more sick than previous cycles but its manageable. I guess to be expected as dosage inincreases.

    I didnt realise you had cyberknife treatment - I was told my tumor was both too big and in wrong place to have it.  I hope you get a positive result.

    yesterday we had warm spring sunshine and I was in the garden all day - me and my sun-loving dog both contented!

    We are a 30min drive from a beach (North Wales) and try to go as often as possible but the wind off the Irish Sea is cold but I pile on the bobble hats!

    We had a holiday in Southwold this summer and had a great time.  That has been only visit to Suffolk but have had a few hols on the Norfolk Broads.  Planning a break a bit nearer to home for late April or May.

    The wedding will be here sooner than you think and Im sure you will enjoy every minute (I have absolutely no comment on outfits though ha ha)

    Speak soon  Gary

  •  

    Well - I have spent the day clothes shopping and bought yet another outfit!  Much happier with this one (at the moment anyway haha). We are about a 20min drive from Southwold and were there yesterday taking Alfie for a walk.  We occassionally hire a cottage there or nearby at Dunwich for the weekend - its a quant place but property is very overpriced, a beach hut costs around £70,000 !!  We live around 2miles from The Broads!

    Sorry to hear you have been feeling a bit sick. Chemo certainly seems to attack the digestive system in one way or another for most people.  I either seem to spend all day on the loo or the opposite (too much info, sorry).  Yep I had cyberknife treatment on the 4th Feb so am hoping its got the tumour - will find out on the 16th April.  If you had surgery and are now having chemo, I presume the tumour is now smaller?  It is often worth sending in your latest scan results to these guys for their opinion because they have a totally different opinion to most oncologists/surgeons who seem to know little about new treatments.  Gammaknife is very similar and is available on the NHS.  If you need any contact information give me a post and I will let you know.

    The eclipse was a bit disappointing here today - it was very cloudy so we didnt really see anything.  Have a good weekend and take good care of yourself x

  • Hi Max,

    Yes I had surgery when first diagnosed.  They removed as much as possible but it was still large - more than twice the size considered for cyberknife and also too close to optic nerves.  It did not reduce any further following radio therapy. So will have to wait for scan on 30th to see what chemo has done.

    We enjoyed Southwold and stayed in a cottage just behind the beach huts.  Weve had sbout 6 boating hols on the Broads over the years.

    Glad to hear youve settled on the outfit - I was about to suggest Alfies food bowl if you still undecided about the hat!

    Take care   Gary

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    The feeding bowl idea is a good one hahaha, hadnt thought of that, a few bonio's and dentastix glued on and I would be well away!     Will be keeping everything crossed for you on the 30th Gary and praying for good news!

    Are you up to much this week?  Hubby works away 3days a week, so he went this morning. Then its London for pre-chemo tests on Thursday and treatment Friday so nothing too exciting happening here this week.  The weather is good and I can hear the weeds in my garden saying 'come and get me' so thats what I am about to do.  Am meeting up with some ex-workcolleagues Weds so that will break the week up a bit.

    Take care x

  • Hi Max good to hear from you though my reply is a bit slow -sorry.

    First cold  bug is toying with me since starting chemo.  Colds usually progress to a chesty cough so Im trying not to panic that I will be coughing too much to keep still for the scan by monday.  Hey Ho.  Good luck with your treatment today.

    Went to a garden centre earlier in the week and bought a few late spring plants they were selling off.  Weather is mixed here and still getting frosts but these were a bargain and worth a punt. I like the garden but have no gardening talent beyond buy, plant, prune and weed!  Plus Bertie likes to "help" with any plants that catch his attention.

    Best wishes Gary

  • Hi Max

    Had good news from yesterday's scan - the doc said it showed "an improvement" over last time.  I will carry on with current chemo plans over coming months.  It was a long day and ironically I didnt feel so good when we got home so we havent celebrated the news yet.  But there is definitely a bottle of wine calling my name here somewhere!

    How did last week go for you?  Swap news soon?  Gary