It really does help! I said to my mum laughter trumps fear always! Even yesterday after seeing my gp I said to my mum "feel like I should've been more specific when I prayed for bigger ***" and she burst out laughing. She's been a great help in keeping me calm, my sister is the worry wart in the family who can be somewhat dramatic compared to how we are but I can understand her fear, im her baby sister and tbh I've already been through far too much already in my 29 years on this earth, maybe that's why im calmer than expected? God knows, but my mums just being normal she's giving me as much warning about certain things to do with the mammogram and will answer questions if she can, however tbh she opted to go alone to all her appointments so a lot of it is a blur for her sadly and she's just being normal about it if that makes sense? I'm just glad I've got my 14 and 11 year old sons keeping me occupied, my eldest over heard me talking to my mum and asked what was going on, I told him nothing to be worried about and told him I'd found a lump like his nana had but it could be nothing doesn't mean anything bad they just have to run tests to check and he seemed fine and even said "even if it is bad nana was fine wasn't she?" So I'm glad he's not worrying, he's just being his usual self today and annoying my youngest by staring at him lol!

Love the fact you've been able to make friends with others going through this! How is your treatment going? Xx

We totally NEED these people in our lives to help us though! My youngest (14) asked me if I'd need specially made bras after my surgery with one side bigger than the other :) I didn't! 
My treatment is going well. REALLY well thank you xx

Operation a success with lovely clear margins. I had a lumpectomy and was worried I'd lose loads of my boob. The surgeon worked wonders though and if I'm totally honest there is very little difference. And my poorly boob actually looks in better shape (pertness wise) than my other one! Every cloud honey :) I can have them evened up should I choose to further down the line. 
 

I'm one round into 4 rounds of chemo. My next one is on Friday. I feel thankful as I wasn't hit too hard with any really nasty side-effects after the first one. No sickness which I think I was dreading the most. Just tired and struggled sleeping during first week due to the steroids.  After about Day 5 I started to feel much more 'normal'  and feel pretty much ok now so ready to cope with the next blast! Onwards and upwards and although it's been a very unwanted 'blip' it's been more manageable than I ever thought possible at the start. 

Are you now waiting for your referral app to come through? 
 

Sarah xx 
 

Ohh that's good then! 
I actually got a text this morning with a link so I was able to book my appointment for 9:10am next Wednesday. I was stressing out last night wondering when I'd be contacted as the woman I seen at gp surgery said I'd either get a call or a letter with appointment but it was her first day there so she didn't know their procedures bless her! So since booking it I've felt a lot calmer as I don't have to worry about anything other than having the mammogram itself. The gp I spoke with did tell me it was highly unlikely to be a cyst due to how big it is (about 5cm) and the fact it's pain free it's also rock hard and doesn't lose its shape when I press down on it. Naturally been feeling my boob up alot past few days keeping an eye on it, to the point my youngest said "stop touching your boobs they ain't getting bigger" think he thought I was trying to rub them to make them bigger lmao! 
 

 Still hasn't really hit me yet and I'm not necessarily scared. It's the not knowing that's scaring me more. I reckon I'll be a nervous wreck after my mammogram next Wednesday so I'm hoping and praying the results won't take ages! 

Did you only just notice your lump? 5cm is quite big! Not meaning cancer-wise just that did it just appear? Mine was 3cm but buried inside my boob behind a cyst apparently! I didn't feel any lumps. I just had a bit of a weird sensation on the outer side of my boob. It felt like a splinter type feeling when I touched  it! It was the cyst that was making it sore - thank god for the cyst otherwise I'd still prob be none the wiser! 
 

Great you have sorted your appointment. One hurdle over honey. It was my first mammogram and it was fine. Bit uncomfortable - boobs being clamped in a vice but over really quickly. Even the biopsy was ok. It was just hearing the Dr doing the ultrasound say she was 'very worried' that made me want to jump of the bed and run a mile! All I remember was saying 'How worried?' God knows how many times! 
 

You sound like you are being super pragmatic and brave honey. It's def the best way to approach it all. Thing is it's not cancer until they tell you it is. And if it is you will have a treatment plan in place very soon and be on the road to being cancer free and getting all better xxx 

I only just noticed it on Friday to be honest. But I had a less than a pea sized lump (couldn't always feel it) looked at three times in the last 4 years and kept being told it was likely nothing to worry about but any changes to go back. But now when I think of it they were all bloody male drs and all of them mentioned how my age probably ment it was nothing!  so I think it's that tbh but can't be 100%, last time I checked my boobs was beginning of summer holidays because I remember thinking my boobs had slightly gotten bigger so was rejoicing in the fact I had some extra boob (I'm very flat chested ) lol but I was only groping my boobs tbh  wasn't checking them. On Friday I had an itchy boob that just so happened to be in that area and lightly itched and immediately felt a rock hard lump underneath the skin. I then looked at my boobs in the mirror and whilst my left one kind of blend into my body, my right one now has actual under boob and is sagging. But I reckon due to my small breast size I'll probably need an ultrasound scan instead because there's defo not enough boob to flop onto a table lmao
 

the gp yesterday was great she checked my neck and under arms for swelling and all was good and even said she was putting me forward for a referral before examining me. 

 

You're definitely right there and my mum asked if I'm scared it's cancer and I said "not really because if it's that I'm guessing they'll already have a plan in place on how to deal with it" I just think maybe all the research I did when my mum had breast cancer has helped me a lot especially knowing survival rates are high! Thanks to how my mums cancer treatment went my attitude towards cancer isn't as morbid and scary as it once was.

don't know how you dealt with them saying that though that'd infuriate me if they said that without giving an explanation, how long did it take for you to get the results?

I did ask why she was worried and she explained that the way it looked meant it couldn't be a cyst. I think she was hesitant to say anything until biopsy confirmed it. I'm not even sure they can tell you from just an ultrasound image incase they are wrong? Although I've read on here that some women do find out on the day. 
 

I'm in Brighton and it's standard practice here to book a return/results app the day you have tests. It's a two week wait. This gives time for analysis and for results to go in front of the MDT. All areas are slightly different though I think. 
 

I agree, when it comes to dealing with cancer knowledge definitely makes you feel more in control. Not Dr Google knowledge though whilst thinking you might/might not have cancer or whilst waiting for results. I made mistake initially of over-googling and it was a HUGE rooky error! 
 

Sarah xxx

Ohh atleast she gave info although I can imagine that's still frustrating being unable to find the answer out for another two weeks. 
 

i hope I'll be able to book like you on same day I'd rather know I'm waiting two weeks rather than jumping at every phone call lol

yeah I'm staying away from Google for the most part. And even if I do Google it's nothing I didnt already know from my mums experience so the urge to Google is t that strong thank god! Have to admit though I know my sister will be googling everything but luckily I know she'll be keeping it to herself. 
 

thank you for all your kind words btw they've definitely been a boost today been nice to be able to talk about it as I haven't been able to properly even with my mum as the kids are always within ear shot so don't want to be worrying them! 

No problem at all xx 

Here if you need to chat, vent, worry or laugh :)

Please keep me updated on how it goes next week honey. Lots of love xx 

Thank you so very much for your reply, you have made me feel a lot cooler about this situation, tomorrow is when we see the consultant, and then we know where we are with this, to be honest, I'm feeling more confident about this than I was a couple of days ago, no matter what the out come is, I will post. X