I am a Humanist. Before I was born I did not exist and when I die, I will just go back to that state of non existence, that's it, the end. I have no doubts about this, it would be nice to believe in going to a better place, but, no it does not happen.

If, however, I was wrong, WHICH I AM NOT, I'm still in trouble:

If the imaginary friend in the sky is a Catholic, he will have my excommunication document;

If he is a Protestant, he will have copies of the last e.mails I sent to the vicar;

The Jehovah’s Witnesses and the Mormons will have told him how THEY cross the road to avoid ME;

If he is Jewish, I haven't had the end of my dick chopped off, and I'm not having that done just in case;

Although I don't drink very much. I do occasionally imbibe and I shave and have my hair cut, so no favours from Allah;

If he is the Hindu God, well I eat beef, the animal they hold sacred, so no chance there;

That only leaves the Buddhists, and they believe thst if you have lived a good live, you go up a social class, but if you've lived a bad life, you drop down the social scale;

So thats it then the most I could hope for is coming back as a cockroach