Hi Zarker

I had severe displacia of the vocal chords around 5 years ago and was told that I needed laser treatment immediately as it "was very close to cancer". I had laser treatment a few times and had to have biopsies done around every 2 - 3 months but in my case it had gone too deep so they could only laser the surface and it kept coming back. If you are a smoker you should give it up immediately as my consultant told me to avoid smoke at all costs.

I went on to have larygneal cancer but I was stage T2-3 when I was eventually diagnosed. I was successfully treated with radiotherapy 28 months ago and touch wood everything is fine and my voice is better than it's been for years.

On a positive note they are closely monitoring you and as you are at a very early stage hopefully they will be able to get rid of it with laser treatment alone.

I wish you well and hope that the next laser treatment will be the end of it.

Marion x

Hi Marion ,

Thanks very much for your reply it was most helpful. I hope you don't mind me asking but how long was it from when they found displacia to you being diagnosed with laryngeal cancer? As this is what I think may be happening to me. They said inicially It could be treated with laser alone and after my last laser treatment yesterday that the return was on the surface only and did not warrant rdiotherapy at the moment and he had done deeper biopsys which he says hes sure arn't cancerous. This has as you know been a very difficult time for me as i'm so scared of loosing my voice or having to have a laryngectomy which I've been told is unlikely. i'm reassured to know that after your treatment your voice is now good. Thank you again and I hope you continue to do well. Andy

p,s gave up smoking 5 years ago and after this will never go back to it!

Hi Lucky us,

been reading your threads. I honestly think if they had found something that concerned them they would have had your husband straight back in to do more surgery or at least tell you whats going on so it could be a case of no news is good news. When they first saw your husband they would know just by looking if there was anything that needed immediate attention and the delay is probably just for healing. When I had my first laser they told me a week later it was T1 and that they would be doing more laser then keeping an eye on it. I expect they will have a look at it with the endo scope on 22nd to see how it looks after the surgey and if it looks ok they will leave it for the monthly observation. Thats what happened after I had the second laser they just said as far as they could see it looked fine and just told me to come back in a month, of course subsequently I have had more problems but everyone is different perhaps your husband will be lucky and the laser will be enough. Try not to worry and avoid looking at articles on the internet they are not representative and in my experience cause panic and are not helpful although I'm sure michael means well by suggesting it.

I'm doing ok have got a nasty chest infection which is making the RT more difficult, bad timing I guess. Good luck for 22nd keeping everything crossed. :-)

Take care

Andy

Hi Marion,

RT was going really well till last sat when I developed a really nasty cold which has turned chest/throat infection which is making me cough constantly throwing 'salt in the wounds' of my already sore throat. Fortunately I can just about swallow so am getting some food down but it is extremely uncomfortable and can only get relief from co codamol my wonder drug! Its weird as I think the chest infection and coughing are worse than the RT as i can't remember ever having anything like this as i'm generally fit and don't get many colds.

I'm having to take some time off from work which is annoying as I wanted to wait till the end of the treatment before I stop working but guess it can't be helped. I work in clerkenwell at a small private health studio ( you asked where I work) which is close to the city, guess i'm not a great advert for personal training at the moment!

have been texting chris, bless him, he's been great, giving me encouragement it really is something when someone you don't know is prepared to go out on a limb for you, mind you guess know each other a little by know except what we look or sound like which in my case is a whisper at the moment. Hope all is well with you.

Love Andy

Hi Michael

he has T1 stage cancer he has never been the type to read up on things where as i am he has never looked on this site just asks every now and again what it says. thanks for your continued support and will be back on after the 22 to let you know what happens

Thanks

Luckyus

Hi Andy

I agree with the "no news is good news" theory, So sorry you are going through the mill at the moment RT sounds hard enough without the chest infection. On the whole i am not a worrier but my husband is. Every day i am gratfull we caught it so early.

Thank you for your continued help

Luckyus

Hi Andy

Sorry to hear that you have a chest infection at the moment.  I had bad cough during my RT and was worried that I would choke under the mask or move during a cough and get zapped in the wrong place!  I know what you mean about sometimes the mask feeling more tighter sometimes and I used to worry that I was in the wrong position.

I'm sure your throat is getting sorer by the week now.  You may have to take something stronger like morphine - what a wonderful drug that is but knocks you out and adds to the tiredness.

You might have been told that you will feel worse AFTER your treatment has finished.  I was really pleased that my neck was fine and not too red and I even had a little bit of voice then all of a sudden a week after I finished RT my neck was bright red like I had severe sunburn and my voice went completely.  Make sure you use your aquious cream liberally even though your neck might be ok at the moment.

Take care and keep posting if you're feeling up to it.

Love Marion x

Hi Andrea

I'm sorry to hear that you've been bearing the brunt of your husband's frustration.  He must be so worried and unfortunately he is taking it out on his nearest and dearest (we always hurt the ones we love etc).

He's obviously not coping very well at the moment and I can vouch for the fear and worry of the unknown whilst waiting for results and he has had to ensure a long wait so it is taking its toll on him.

After my RT finished I had to wait 8 weeks before I could have an MRI scan to see if the treatment had worked and a further week for the results of the scan.  I was told that if the treatment had been unsuccessful the only option would have been to have a full laryngectomy. During that long wait I just went to pieces and would burst into tears for no apparent reason, I couldn't sleep, I didn't wait to see anyone and was a nightmare to live with.  The only way I could decribe it was in the depths of dispair.  My doctor put me in anti-depressants and sleeping tablets to get me through until the results.  I also saw a counsellor once a week.  Once I got the results and was told everything was good, my mood lifted instantly and I gradually returned to my normal self.

Sorry, not meaning to harp on about me, but just letting know that the way your husband is acting could be because he is find it all too hard to cope with.  Roll on next week and everything will be fine and you can have a peaceful Christmas.  I agree with Andy and feel hopeful that the hospital would have been in touch by now if there was anything wrong as they will have had the results for some time already.

As your husband is a worrier I wouldn't recommend he looks on the internet (sorry Michael) as it scared the life out of me.

Keeping everything crossed for the 22nd.

Love Marion x

Hi Marion

Thank you so much for your reply i do believe it is worry and being off work with his ankle has just made it worse as he has had all day to think of it. Thank god i go to work to get out the way for a while. Thank you for sharing you knowledge about yourself this is what i needed to know its normal (maybe not everyone) shall put hammer away again for now. He has not been on the internet once to try and find anything out and laughs at me for needing to know. Still feels so long until next week the closer its getting the less i am sleeping which means my temper is quicker but trying very hard not to take it out on anyone.

Will post how we get on

Thanks

Luckyus

Hi Luckyus

Just a quickie to say good luck for tomorrow.  Let us know how it goes.

Take care and try not to worry (easier said than doneI know).

Love Marion x

Good luck for tomorrow. Keeping everything crossed for you. Sure it will be fine.

Andy

Hi Marion,

Into my fifth week and doing ok. The infection has cleared up but am still coughing a fair bit but the doc says that could just be the irritation caused by the RT. I''ve had no voice since I had the infection 2 weeks ago, I guess everything is still inflamed  and swollen with all the coughing etc and told it will come back when treatment has finished, I hope!!! So am whispering to my clients at work which is a bit strange but getting used to it. Luckily I can still swallow solid food even had a sandwich today but finding i'm not enjoying food as much as I normally do. My neck is red but not painful useing lots of creams etc.

So looking forward for this to be over with and am crossing each session of the list, which i'm treating as my advent calender, final day jan 5th!!!! Hope you have a lovely christmas and great new year and thank you so much for all your help and support through out this year, don't know what I would have done with out you.

Love

Andy x

Hi Marion,

Into my fifth week and doing ok. The infection has cleared up but am still coughing a fair bit but the doc says that could just be the irritation caused by the RT. I''ve had no voice since I had the infection 2 weeks ago, I guess everything is still inflamed  and swollen with all the coughing etc and told it will come back when treatment has finished, I hope!!! So am whispering to my clients at work which is a bit strange but getting used to it. Luckily I can still swallow solid food even had a sandwich today but finding i'm not enjoying food as much as I normally do. My neck is red but not painful useing lots of creams etc.

So looking forward for this to be over with and am crossing each session of the list, which i'm treating as my advent calender, final day jan 5th!!!! Hope you have a lovely christmas and great new year and thank you so much for all your help and support through out this year, don't know what I would have done with out you.

Love

Andy x

Hi Andy

Thanks for your kind words, I feel very humble but I'm so glad if I've helped a bit.

I can't believe you are still working in your 5th week of RT - I'm sure I was feeling pretty c**p after 20-odd zaps of RT!  Your fitness training has obviously paid off.  Don't worry about your voice, it will come back but it might take a while so don't panic.  I've probably already told you (and I'm sure your onc has told you) that you will actually feel worse after the treatment has finished.  It's horrible that you have to go through this over Christmas but only a week or so to go and you can put all this behind you.

I had a bit of a scare as my voice was quite croaky for the last 2 weeks so I brought my appointment forward to see my consultant yesterday.  Luckily he said my larynx looked perfectly normal and he put it down to the stress of Christmas (phew).  At least it's put my mind at rest and I won't be worrying over Christmas now.

I hope Christmas will be as well as can be expected for you and wish you a very happy and healthy New Year.

Take care and I'll be in touch soon.

Love Marion x

Hi Marion,

Happy new year! Hope you had a good one and all is well with you. Finished the RT last weds and as soon as I finished started to feel worse, as expected. My throat is still sore and i'm still coughing up lots of gunge but things feel like they are slowly improving and i;m beginnig to swallow easier ann the skin on my nexk is healing well.

The obvious thing i'm concerned about is my voice. I'm able to get some growly sounds out of it on the lower register, sounds are starting to come through but its still really weak and it hurts when I speak. Was this the same for you? Guess I just expected to finish treatment and find it all back to normal..wishful thinking!!

I was working the last 2 weeks but felt so groggy and tired my consultant has suggested I rest up in order to speed up my recovery. I feel a bit ragged at the moment but I guess the worse is over now and keeping my fingers crossed that my voice will return soon. I have to back in 6 weeks so I asked the consultant when will I know if i'm cured and he just said this WILL cure it. I hope he's right!

Best wishes to you.

Love Andy

Andy welcome back!  Happy (and healthy) New Year!  Hope your Christmas was as well as could be expected.

I have been looking out for your posts but assumed that you felt like c**p but have been thinking of you and wondered how you are.

So glad it's all over - you must be so relieved.  I can't believe you carried on working so long but as a trainer your fitness probably helped.  Now try and rest and let your body recover!

Please don't worry about your voice, it's very early days!  I can't remember exactly how long it was before my voice came back to normal but I remember it coming back a bit just towards the end of the treatment and then it went completely about a week after it all finished which really worried me as I thought the treatment hadn't worked.  I know my voice was quite good in the October as I went back to work on a part-time basis so that would have been 2 months later but it came back well before then.  When it does come back don't be surprised if it strains easily at first as it will take quite some time to heal.  I remember one of the girls from work ringing me while I was still off work and for the first time in months I answered the phone and she asked to speak to my mum!  She didn't realise it was me and was so shocked as she had never heard my "normal" voice before as it had been husky for years.

I had to wait 8 weeks to hear that the treatment was sucessful and that appointment was the scariest!  You will probably have an MRI scan just prior to your appointment.

Take care Andy and I wish you a complete recovery but I have no doubt that you are cured.

Love Marion x

HI Marion,

Thanks for your reply. Im starting to feel a lot better. swallowing easier, coughing starting to subside and voice making some progress although when I speak I sound about 90! I'm going back to work next week just part time as i'm self employed and need to earn some money so have told clients I will only whisper and not talk too much during sessions!

As you say its early days for my voice and I have to be patient. I always want everything done by yesterday and hate having to wait especially as I havent been able to speak since the beginning of dec, but guess I have no choice. Also looking forward to having a nice glass of wine but will wait till soreness in my mouth has cleared and my voice is back. I've spent most of  this week just sleeping which I think has done me the power of good and i'm lucky that I have a flexibility in my job to come home and rest between sessions.

I'm not thinking too much about the results of the treatment as I've got to the stage now where I can't worry any more and what will be will be, guess I've done all I can. Have a great w/e and speak soon.

Love Andy

Hi Andy

Just a quick post to see how you are.

I can't believe you're going back to work so early but try not to overdo it as you must be still feeling tired.  Has your voice started to come back yet? Do you know when you are having your scan?  Sorry about all these questions!

I've decided to do the "Shine Walk" for cancer research on 1 October - it's an overnight walk around London (either 13 or 26 miles).  My friend who recently lost her husband to cancer has asked me to do it with her.  I'm not sure if we are doing the full or the half one but I'd better get some walking practise!

Hope you're ok but let us know how you're getting on.

Love Marion x

Hi Marion,

Thanks for your message. Unfortunately I don't have much choice about going back to work as I have a mortgage to pay and  have my business to run which won't work without me  and I can't live on £62 a week sickness benefit. I'm only training 4 clients a day and live very neatr my wotk so I can come home and rest between clients and am finding it ok.

I actually felt worse sitting at home worrying about things as I love my job and I think having a routine is helping me feel things are getting back to normal. The downside is I don't have my voice back yet and my throat is still a bit sore, its been nearly 3 weeks since I finished the RT and am not sure if this is normal as most people tend to get it back towards thre end of tretment. I mentioned about working to the consultant and he said I need to rest my voice but i told him i'm only whispering and working part time and he seemed to think this would be alright. I'm wondering if i'm straining it by working, there's no one to ask as my next appointment with the consultant isn't till mid feb.

Anyway hope your well

Andy x

Hi Andy

It's a shame you had to rush back to work but I do understand the money thing.  I was really lucky as my firm paid me full pay for the time I was off - although it was only 10 weeks in all.  I know what you mean about sitting at home worrying as it was at that time that I became depressed.  I needed to get back to work for normality.

Try not to worry about your voice Andy - we are all different and there's no set time for when it should come back.  I've met quite a few people now through clinic appointments who have had some form of throat cancer and they can all speak.  In fact, I probably already told you, my voice came back and went again for quite some time which really freaked me out!  It's strange but my consultant told me not to whisper as it still strains your vocal cords but I'm sure you will know if you are pushing yourself too hard.  I can really understand your frustration though.

I put my photo on my profile so that everyone can put a "face to a name" but for some reason it's not showing (must have done something wrong)!

Anyway look after yourself and let me know when you get your voice back - hope it's soon!

Love Marion x

Hi Marion,

Yes would have liked to have had 10 weeks off on full pay! but like you said its much better to be doing something and I feel ok in my self apart from the voice. Its so frustrating as I really love my job and this is the time of the year I could be picking up new clients but I can't really take anyone on at the moment sounding like this.

My present clients have been wonderful and are ok with me whispering and tell me to shut up if I;m talking too much! Guess I have to patient and wait for everything to heal. I spoke to my consultant's assistant today who said this was all normal and consistent with post radiotherapy and also said it was ok to work as long as i don't over do it.

Would be good so see a photo of you and put the face to the name, will try and put one up of me.

Thanks again marion and hope all is well with you and will certainly let you know when my voice is back then we can arrange a get together with chris :-)

Andy x

Hi Marion/Andy

Hope your both well.

Marion firstly thanks for mail other day. I will reply when I get a spare 10 mins. Life is hectic at moment going from the North to London every week and trying to spend time with Kids at weekend.

Andy,

I'm glad your on road to recovery but try not to push yourself too hard. I know you want to get back and you need to work  but don't try and run before you can walk. I am sure your voice will improve but as I told you other week on phone my voice is still improving even now 6 months after my RT and there are dips in it some days. I guess it is a long road to recovery and there will always be times when it is not as good as you hope but try and remember the bad times when you had no voice at all. Things will get better.

We must sort that drink out soon. I will be in London until the end of May. I am working on olympics at Stratford so on Central line. Can get anywhere in 30 mins so Just choose somewhere to go.

Speak soon,

Chris

Hi Andy

Sounds like you've got your clients sorted out and they understand the situation.  Lets hope they do as they're told and won't need you to shout at them ;-)

It's bad timing that you can't take any new clients on at the moment as this is the perfect time for getting fit post-Christmas but there will be the Spring when people will want a beach body!  I keep meaning to go to the gym but I bought myself a wii fit  ....... must get round to using it though!

As my photo isn't coming up with my messages, have a look at my profile as it's on that.

We'll have to get together while Chris is still in London, so let us know when you're feeling well enough as I can go anywhere on the tube.

Speak soon.

Love Marion x