45 year old diagnosed with Gleason 7 prostrate cancer (3+4). Was feeling positive but now I feel different. Is it normal to have negative thoughts and feelings?

Hi

i got diagnosed with level 7 (3+4) prostrate cancer last week.

No treatment is required at this stage as I’m being actively monitored (every 4 month blood PSA tests and 12 months MRI scan).

I’ve been told it’s low grade.

Initially after being told I was fairly positive, it’s low grade, no treatment is required and it’s being actively monitored so if anything changes it’ll get picked up early, I was comfortable to tell my close friends and family and senior colleagues at work. I didn’t want a fuss I told them, I’m not that sort of guy. I’m a very private person when it comes to personal health matters.

After a few days though I feel different, less positive. Maybe it’s hit me that I have cancer. I’m starting to Google survival rates. I’m starting to think differently about things in my life that would ordinarily excite me. I’m now starting to feel self pity, I want to message some of the people I told to tell them I’m feeling down but I don’t want to burden them.

I’m starting to feel angry at my body. I’m starting to plan for life without me (I have a wife and two teenage children).

I’m hoping people will tell me I’m overreacting and these are normal thoughts and that 3+4 is indeed low risk. 

Thank you 

  • Hi   I had a different cancer to you, but i can assure you your thoughts and feelings are normal and you will go through a whole range of them, in my opinion a cancer diagnosis is a complete head ***. One thing i will say is stay of Dr Google. I don't know where you are but my hospital has a charity attached to it where you can speak to people and I'm sure most do I've seen lots of people on the forums mention one called Maggie's which I think is in quite a few places also Cancer Research and Macmillan have people, and they will all be people who actually know what they are talking about which Dr Google doesn't. I'm sure your family wont think you are a burden and will understand you feeling down as for your friends the true ones will be there for you. Sending hugs. Xx

  • Thank you  , I truly appreciate you taking the time to reply. I will reach out to the charity. Merry Christmas!

  • Hello John

    Welcome to the forum and the emotional rollercoaster that anything connected with cancer brings. To preserve your mental well being don't do this on your own even if you are a very private person. Talk about it when it feels rijght to those close to you and not so close to you. Bungle mentions various charities too our local NHS hospital has a drop in centre to support those with cancer and their families. Yes you will feel differently about things and the reset is a good time to evaluate what is important to you in life. Planning for your family's future is something that you should have already had in place regardless of your health status it is not negative thinking. Dont do Google the info is frequently out of date and the results skewed towards generating revenue for the company and cannot possibly take into account your very individual circumstances. In short your thoughts are normal and could easily apply to anyone with other equally horrid diseases. Get on wìth enjoying your life and have a great Christmas with your family

    Ed