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Very unsure about what to say: my last scan showed that I now have a brain tumour

ajhappy
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I had a very severe TBI about 18 months ago and it put me in a coma for quite a while… I had to relearn a lot of stuff that I didn’t understand why or think I would ever have to do in my lifetime but I have very regular checkups but I’ve been able to get through it. Although I’ve been getting more frequent problems including headaches, seizures etc, and my last scan basically showed that I now have a brain tumour along with the rest of it. I really don’t want to shout or swear but sometimes I just feel like I am really struggling. I wanted to enjoy my life but I’m quite honestly struggling.

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    I realise I’m replying to myself but I’m a little bit confused, scared and I don’t know what to do going forward with regards to people I love, because I don’t know how to broach the situation as yeah it is malignant… I live on my own and my only next of kin is 200+ miles away.

  • Hello ajhappy

    I'm so sorry to hear that after your TBI 18 months ago you've not been given the news that you have a brain tumour. Undoubtedly this would have been hard to news to hear and it's understandable that you may be feeling a whole range of emotions at the moment. 

    You've mentioned in your post that you live alone and your family live quite some distance away. Do you have friends close by for support ajhappy? 

    It's understandable that you may be struggling to let your family know this news. Naturally, you won't want to upset or worry them but if you are able to find a way to tell them then hopefully they will be able to support you through this difficult time. You might find it helpful to have a look at the article on the Macmillan website about how to tell people you have cancer. 

    Here at Cancer Research UK, we have a team of nurses that you can call to talk things through with if you would like. I know they will be happy to listen and offer any advice, information and support they can. They're available Monday to Friday 9am to 5pm on 0808 800 4040. 

    Do talk with your specialist cancer nurse and care team about how you're feeling. Hopefully they will be able to give you some reassurance and answer any outstanding concerns or questions you have. You might also want to have a look at The Brain Tumour Charity website. 

    I do hope that you can find the support you need from family, friends and health professionals ajhappy. Know that the Cancer Chat community is here for you if it helps to have a safe space to put down in writing how you're feeling. 

    Best wishes, 
    Jenn
    Cancer Chat moderator 

  • Offline in reply to ajhappy

    I'm so sorry AJ. I don't think there's any easy way to break the news, carrying it alone must be really difficult too. I'm a carer rather than someone suffering from cancer. I just wanted to offer a response. I really hope you find support and comfort soon. It's a difficult load to carry alone. The charities offer a lot so make use of them and I wish you the easiest breaking of bad news possible. I tend to rip things off like a plaster and blurt it all out but I've never had such news of my own to share.

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