Hello Laura.

I'm sorry to hear that you've recently been told you have skin cancer. Hearing the word cancer can knock you sideways, regardless of the stage or prognosis. It's understandable that you're feeling overwhelmed by this news. 

It's good to hear that the specialist is confident this can be treated and that you already have a date for the surgery. 

We know that for many people it can help to talk things through with someone and it sounds from your post as if you might find it beneficial to speak with someone about your concerns and questions. If you'd like to chat things through with one of our nurses you're welcome to call them on 0808 800 4040, Monday to Friday 9am to 5pm. I know they will be happy to listen and offer any advice, information, and reassurance they can. We also have some information on our website about managing your emotions that you may find helpful. 

I hope that things go smoothly for you Laura. Do keep in touch and let us know how you get on. 

Best wishes, 
Jenn
Cancer Chat moderator 

Thankyou Jenn I really appreciate your message and informationxx

Hi Laura

I've just had my 50th birthday and been diagnosed with BCC skin cancer too. I completely understand your concerns- and the guilt for feeling worried when it's probably contained and hasn't spread! But, for me, it's the 'probably' bit. I've had quite a few major illnesses and conditions in my adult life, including brain surgeries and blood disorders, but none of them have ever been straightforward or 'typical.' I've had my tumour for at least 2 years, as I never thought it could be anything like cancer and so I'm worried that it might have had time to spread. I know it's unlikely and I'm usually a rational and (fairly) intelligent person, but I can't help being concerned. 

Everyone I've told (family and close friends) have been shocked initially, but then everything goes back to being completely normal. Noone seems particularly concerned or asks how I'm feeling. Normally, I like to be left alone when I'm ill, I hate people fussing, but this feels different. It would be nice to be asked how I am managing. I know this is completely contradictory to how I usually am and it's probably my own fault that no-one asks, but I've never had cancer before!

I really hope you are managing ok. It's good that you have a date for your surgery. I've been referred urgently, but it's a4-6 month wait. If you ever want a chat, I'm always here. 

Hi Gela 

Thankyou for your message it's really nice to no I'm not on my own I no exactly what you mean I have had mine for about 2 years aswell first doctor I saw told me it was a cyst nothing suspicious but I thought it was changing so went back again they told me not suspicious but would refer just to put my mind at rest and had to wait months for appointment I went on my own to the appointment not thinking it was serious and didn't expect to get a diagnoses so quick and definitely not cancer but I don't no what to expect once it's gone they haven't said what will happen how do I no it hasn't spread.

I no exactly what you mean I'm the same as you like to be left alone but now I just want to take my mind off it and be distracted and be asked how i feel rather than be told your a strong person then nothing the people that have checked on me are the ones I least expected it from and ones I did expect to be there haven't even asked me once since I told them I really hope you get your date soon and not waiting to long I think the waiting makes it worse xxxx

Hi Laura

Thanks for your reply, it's good to talk to someone who understands! I was exactly the same.... Had to wait 6 weeks to see my GP. Then the hospital rang to say they couldn't see me within the 2 weeks they should, so that was another 5 weeks wait. I went to my appointment on my own as well, for exactly the same reason! I never expected it to be cancer. 

I've got two grown up girls who live nearby and my little grandson, who is 3. I split with my husband 10 years ago and have a lovely partner, but we don't live together, so mostly it's just me and the dog. I had to do working 3 years ago due to health issues, which gutted me. I was a behaviour specialist, working in schools to help the teachers manage 'disruptive' behaviour and the families at home too. I really cared about the children I worked with, so it broke my heart to have to leave them. I've got my head around it now and now I've got this to deal with, lol. 

My close family all live within a few miles, which is great and I see them write regularly. I'm just surprised at their responses really. I just think if any of them had (God forbid) had this news,I would be checking in on them all the time. But, I guess, at the end of the day, I know they care, but are probably not sure what to do or say. 

It's just such a huge shock, isn't it?! Like, I really thought they'd just see me at the hospital and say that everything was fine and not to worry. My tumour is by my lip, so that's also not great when they're taking it out surgically. I don't know anything else beyond that. 

It's great to have met you and do stay in touch xxx

Bless you. Kids are more resilient than we give them credit for. When I had my brain surgery I had to shave the bit of hair they'd left me with off because it looked ridiculous! Lol. I had a big curved scar on my head, held with lots of staples. I looked like Frankenstein or something I wore bandanas to cover it. My youngest was 7 and my eldest was 9. My youngest was really scared and didn't want to see my wound, but when she did, she was fine with it. I'm sure yours will be the same. Probably a bit unsure, but will accept it quickly. 

I also have a tiny growth on my right bottom lash line, but they think it's ok, so fingers crossed.

Lovely to chat xxx

Thankyou for your reassurance I didn't realise how much I needed to hear that my husband keeps trying to reassure me but it worries me so much that they will be scares to look at me and I'm so sorry you have had to go through all of that and fingers crossed that one is ok xxx