I'm scared

I was diagnosed with high grade DCIS in December and had my SLN removed and biopsies. They found invasive cancer cells in them. So they are now planning scans to see if it has spread to my bones, liver and lungs. I need to start chemo in the next few week, then after that, I am to have a masectomy. They are still waiting for one more result on the biopsy to come back, which may indicate I am triple negative. I am absolutely terrified that it's going to have spread and I won't be cured. My husband died of cancer 6 six years ago when our children were only 16, 15 and 13. They are aware what is happening and are scared too. I remarried in February last year and shortly after my father died of lung cancer. My husband is so upset, as is my mum. I'm trying so hard to put a brave face on for them all but I'm so scared inside that I'm not going to survive this. I'm new to all this and still trying to understand it all. 

  • Hi AHopey,

    A very warm welcome to our forum, although I'm sorry to hear why you're here. 

    Waiting for results is always an anxious time. A diagnosis of cancer always brings us up short and we find ourselves coping with a plethora of different emotions. The way you are feeling is, unfortunately, normal. You still have some unknowns, which need more testing, which make things even harder. Irrespective of the results, you will all feel better, once you know exactly what you are dealing with and can get on with treatment.

    I am so sorry to hear that you have already had to contend with cancer with your first husband. Even if this has spread it is still treatable, or they wouldn't have mentioned chemo. This is a positive. I lost my mum to secondary breast cancer, which had spread to her liver, lungs, brain and bone. At that time there was nothing that they could do for her. Since then I have had 2 bouts of cancer myself and there was just no comparison between the diagnostics, treatment and after care which we both experienced. There are a number of people on this forum, who are dealing with a terminal diagnosis. Fortunately, there are still maintenance treatments available now, that weren't available in the past. 

    It sounds as if you had a year of highs and lows last year. I sincerely hope that, despite the bad start to 2024, things will improve from here on in.

    Please keep in touch and let us know know you get on with your scans. We are always here for you.

    Kind regards,

    Jolamine xx

  • Thankyou so much. Even though I'm surrounded by love and support, I've felt so lonely. Reading about other people's experiences on here has actually given me hope and reassurance. So glad I found this site xx

  • Thankyou. Even though I'm surrounded by love and support I've felt so lonely. Reading other people's experiences on here has given me hope and reassurance. Xx

  • You need never feel alone now that you have found this site. Sometimes, it is easier to talk to strangers here, who have all experienced what you are going through, than to talk to family and friends. There is a great bunch of people here for help, advice and support.

    I hope that your scans come through quickly. We are always here for you.

    Kind regards,

    Jolamine xx

  • Hi, so sorry to hear of your diagnosis, it is such a scary time. As you say, it is so upsetting for all the family too. I was diagnosed with invasive ductal carcinoma on January 18th. I have two lumps plus cancer cells in breast tissue and 1 lymph node.I will need chemo and Herceptin first as I'm HER2 positive. Then mastectomy, radiotherapy and hormone blockers for 5-10 years. I'm currently waiting for ct scan results and it's driving me crazy, as I still don't know if it's spread anywhere else. I have oncologist appointment on 14th February, so hopefully treatment will start soon. I wish you well moving forward. Xx