Going through the same. It's hard to know what to do for the best. Encourage to eat .....leave them to not eat???

I think I'm going to reach out to health professionals more. My problem is parents don't want to talk about prognosis or what we should expect so we're filling in the gaps blindly.

You can only do your best - it's the hardest thing I've ever had to do. 

Big hugs. No answers, just empathy. I hear you x

You have family in Germany, and it's only fair if there are siblings (your brothers/sisters) amongst them, they come over and share some of the work too.

This happened to my friend. His dad was dying, and the rest of the family just turned up for the funeral, and one did turn up a day before he died. But they just left my friend to do all the work for months. He had to pack in his job and become a full time carer.

As for the hospital. We've noticed this with my wife's dad too. The hospital become quite pushy and insistent that you take all the burden. He was promised X amount of carers etc, but carers take time to put into place. In fact, it's no secret the biggest bottleneck within the NHS is ill or elderly people taking up beds because care packages take a lot of time to implement. My mother in law was in hospital for 2 months more than she needed to be because the registrar doctor said she wasn't getting released unless there was a care package. Yet the rest of the staff were wanting my wife to pack in her full time job, leave her kid and do all the caring herself. She was made to feel awful. I'm actually pretty sure the stress she was under with her parents over the last 4 years played a part in her cancer. Her immune system was shot to pieces because of both the emotional and physical stress. She was always taking ill herself. They didn't have cancer like your mum, they were just very frail. Her mum died just before covid hit in 2020, and her dad has had to go into a home as my wife simply couldn't go running around after anyone after she was diagnosed with BC.

Basically, make sure you aren't left high and dry and you have a care package in place. Also demand help from family members and don't let them palm you off with they have busy lives. You have a life too and are entitled to a break as they are.

Nurses also only come in the house for around half hour stints. You're left doing the caring for the other 22 hours. It's a full time job with little or no respite.