Hi there, it's so tough having cancer, the fear is it will always rear its ugly head.  So call his original McMillan nurse and ask for help and advice to point you in the right direction.  There are cancer chat groups that meet up, well obviously not at the moment, or he can ask his GP to help with counselling for him.  The sooner you take control and arrange this the better as everything is so slow at the moment.  Our surgery has leaflets to help or look up how to help him on the website.  Also you can call the nurses on this forum and ask them.  Good luck for you both and a healthy future.  Carol 

Hi NannaJ,

Welcome to our forum. Depression often goes hand in glove with a cancer diagnosis. You will probably find the quickest way to get this under control is to make an appointment with his GP. He could prescribe a tablet to help with this. Counselling might also be worth a try, but with all that is happening with the current pandemic, it could take quite some time to get an appointment.

You might find it helpful to speak to his doctor too, as you will be more aware of the changes in his emotions than your husband is.

I do hope that you can get the help you need for him soon.

Please keep in touch and let us know how you get on. We are always here for both of you.

Kind regards,

Jolamine xx

Hi NannaJ2014, 

First of all, I'm sorry for what both of you are being through and congratulations for being so attentive and aware of your husband, you not only love him but you are also a good carer.

Having cancer is often defined as a roller coaster of emotions. Fear of cancer recurrence is a significant issue for most cancer survivors, with nearly half of cancer survivors reporting it at moderate to high levels of intensity. When we feel scared be aggressive is instinctive. In another hand, all the situation of cancer is new and traumatic and we need some time ti adjust.

I easily relate with both of you because I psychologist and also cancer survivor, so I remember my days as you are describing your husband and my mom feeling just like you ( she was my main carer).

You can remember him that he is not alone and that the majority of survivors had the same fear of recurrence and they dindn't relapse. It's possible to leave with fear and learn to give less stregth to it.

Let me know if I can help you  and remember that emotions are just like waves: they go and they come, some are bigger than others ;)

All my love, S.