Dear Jane,

Just a little message to say that I don't think ' you're a funk, at all.

You've been through a great deal, physically and psychologically. To accomplish a little housework and a long walk each day, so soon, is an achievement. It sounds that you are truly listening to your body and allowing the time & rest ' it needs to heal.

I'm just a few days since completing lumpectomy c wide excision & radiotherapy. All has gone well. Yet, I'm finding this has been enough of a challenge to my body and self. I read of survivors continuing their busy jobs and running charity races. I don't intend to do this! But to eat well, walk a bit, rest a lot.

The medical menopause may interrupt your sleep. I find that chamomile tea is a help, 1/2 mug at bed time and the rest, if I wake during the night. I've found that being able to vary the bed temperature helps: a thin duvet plus blankets that I can pull up or fold down, as needs be. Also, I find that trying to keep still in bed helps prevent overheating. Also, ceasing coffee and alcohol.

I too live by myself in the countryside, and chose to keep my diagnosis very private. This means that people I know, are finding it a bit difficult to account for my social absence or fatigue. I'm tending to ask about them, or share books or TV that I've watched.  I'm using this time to think of what interests me now, and to plan new things to do: inexpensive and gentle things that will allow me a little new social contact. I'm planning small challenges, such as taking myself out for a visit to a gallery, museum or exhibition plus a coffee & cake!

I thought about your rib discomfort and breathlessness & wondered whether 10 mins of gentle stretching each day, might help. I have minimal symptoms, having only had radiotherapy to part of my breast. But I am finding some standing ballet stretches of my torso (from various Youtube videos) helpful.

Wishing you very well, for a gentle and good recovery.

Susan

Hi Jane,

I am only half way through my chemos and waiting for surgery, but I feel we have something in common. I have a job which I am not allowed to return to until my treatment finshes and I have come to realise that the job was my life. I am also feeling incredibly bored and lethargic, but there are only so many crosswords, walks etc you can do !

I feel lonely, although the other half is here all the time - he does work from home - but there has been a down turn in his work, so the finances are difficult as well, we are delving into savings heavily.

This all sounds gloomy, BUT, there are plenty of things you can do to fill your time and feel more connected to others. I have found it helpful to find old books I enjoyed and reread them, have a small declutter of a drawer or cupboard and when you pop the unwanted clutter to the charity shop have a look at the books they have, you would be surprised what you find. I have also decided to start making some things for charity - maybe patchwork throws, as I have a stash of fabrics, or pe kit bags for local school kiddies.

I can sympathise with your comment about friends who seem to stop asking how you are, don't let them get away with it ! - send a text or phone them and let them know how important their chat is - you still want to find out what they are up to - I make a point of texting or calling someone at least once a day - I always apologise for bothering them !

I hope this helps - it has helped me to write my witterings, anyway !