Had the lung surgery ,had the mop up chemo .Trying to be positive but still have the feeling cancer has not gone ,Doctors tell me I have a good chance of a cure as I was diagnosed early with lung cancer,however it was in two of my lymph nodes and it was in my vessels .I am not living in exact fear but can't shake off that it is inevitable that this cancer will return meaning more awful chemo or treatment programme .At the moment I am planning a holiday prior to my 3month check as I feel it could return really early.I also feel that my negative attitude may encourage its recurrence ,how do you feel positive once you have had treatment for cancer ?Does anyone else feel like this ?
At the moment I have just finnished chemo 3 weeks ago so still have a few side effects going on ,ie numb feet ,nobbly sore veins hot flushes and sleepless nights aches and pains ,thinking of early retirement 55yrs as I don't want to waste my remaining time working but even that is turning into a tortutous decision.Just going to get another sick note for ?4weeks whilst I am restling with all these things .Just feel getting ill like this came out of the blue ,as I was been investigated for joint pain HPOA ,I knew I had a health problem but just assumed it was some sort of arthritis never dreamed that I had lung cancer ,I exercised, never smoked and i had just dieted to lose a stone in weight slowly.The reason I think the cancer might not have gone is because my original joint pain has started to recurr in my ankles .This could be a chemo effect as it does odd things to you that no one can really explain.Half the time I don't even think my oncologist knows any answers she just tell me a good chance of a cure(I want to believe her) but no guarantees which I understand but in actual fact I want a guarantee .So there ! Apologies for my irrational rant.Anyone else feel like this?
