Thank you Jassoscared, what a beautiful poem.....and oh, how it resonates!  I am terminal and I often lay awake during the night, when it seems that I am the only person on the planet......everything is so quiet............and those are the times when it REALLY hits me.....I am dying......I AM DYING.............and there is nothing I can do about it.  How right you are......we smile, we put on a brave face and we tell everyone, "don't worry about me, I'm fine".........but it is always there isn't it......THAT  question........"how long have I got?  A year......a month........a week?   and we think of all the things we wanted to do, but will never be able to do.........thank you for describing how I often feel, ad God bless you on your journey........the journey that none of us ever signed up for, xx

Blue  -girl

Hello blue girl thank you for your reply to my poem . I can only imagine on how you must be feeling knowing your cancer is terminal,. I have a friend who is in a simular position where her cancer is concerned,she always says my cancer isn't curable,but it's treatable. My friend has breast cancer,no lump waa found,but it has spread to her bones. She is on letrazole like me   and she also has to take  another cancer relatred  drug, and has regular check ups ,evety 3 mths,and has to go for insulations every so often . She just lives her life to the fullest,she does yoga,she has two dogs that she walks each day,and she works  for a charity two days belong in the kitchens,and one day with me in tjiwr charity shop. IShe goes on holidays with her husband ,and fills her days with lots of things, as she says keeping busy  takes her mind off of things. I'm not terminal ,but cancer  has really tried to get me. I had to have a  bowel resection in 2015,as pre cancerous flat sessile polyp waa found, cut away but started to grow back. Then I got breast cancer in May 2020,and now I'm under a gynecologist for vin 3 of the vulva. They now check me every year for that. It's not easy is it,I'm in awe of my friend,she is handling things so well. If you ever feel the need to chat on here,I do pop on from time to time ,it really helps sometimes ,Big hugs are sent your way .x