Maybe some hope for you?

Hi. I came on here in August 2019, scared, after being diagnosed with Stage 4 Bowel Cancer. It has been misdiagnosed for around 2 years and was only really found when I was taken to A&E with sepsis. The cause? The bowel tumour has burst through and spread to my ovaries and, with more investigation, spread to my liver. Of course I looked at the stats..even though you are told not to. I consulted Dr Google.. .even though you are told not to.  I was 5 months from my 40th birthday and now I was being told I may not make it to that!

I couldn't really find any positive stories of people in my situation apart from Deborah James , but she wasn't exactly living a cancer free life. I almost resigned myself to my fate. 

BUT I had an amazing NHS consultant and oncologist and I was given a stoma to help build my strength up, was put on chemo -which extended but continued through COVID. I had the mother of all operations (a pelvic exenteration aka autopsy) in the middle of COVID followed by a liver reaction 3 months later. More chemo....then a CLEAR scan! No evidence of disease. That was July 2021 and I have remained NED since that date and had no further treatment. 

5 years...I have now hit the magic 5 years! I know I am very lucky and not everyone gets here, but I wish I could go back 5 years and tell myself not to compare myself to others, that you are NOT an out of date statistic and just take one day at a time.  

So here I am ..the positive hope story.  I really do hope those reading this get as lucky as me 

There will be awful days where you want to give up, but start each day afresh and keep your head up and keep going. X 

Parents
  • Hi Leigh, I just came across your post from 8 months ago. I was diagnosed with colorectal cancer with liver metastasis in September 24. I did 6 cycles of chemo over 12 weeks and had all the tumours successfully removed last month. My pathology came back clear and I am officially cancer free. It is hard to believe the past 8 months actually happened to me and that I am now at the end of this chapter. I know that this is the outcome we all want (not that we ever want to be in the position to be having to hope for outcomes like this!) and I always try to be positive and pragmatic because there is no point wasting the here and now worrying about something (recurrence) that might never happen - but today has been a bad day and I’ve been thinking about this a lot. Your post has helped me get everything back into perspective again - thank you

Reply
  • Hi Leigh, I just came across your post from 8 months ago. I was diagnosed with colorectal cancer with liver metastasis in September 24. I did 6 cycles of chemo over 12 weeks and had all the tumours successfully removed last month. My pathology came back clear and I am officially cancer free. It is hard to believe the past 8 months actually happened to me and that I am now at the end of this chapter. I know that this is the outcome we all want (not that we ever want to be in the position to be having to hope for outcomes like this!) and I always try to be positive and pragmatic because there is no point wasting the here and now worrying about something (recurrence) that might never happen - but today has been a bad day and I’ve been thinking about this a lot. Your post has helped me get everything back into perspective again - thank you

Children
  • Hi. I'm glad I could help I don't think our fear ever goes away fully...it's such a massive trauma and we are only human. I still have days like that--"is that cramp a new tumour?" "Is my headache a spread?" Etc but no, the cramp is usually something i ate or the headache is dehydration! (Or a stress headache from thinking about the cramp!!). But luckily these days get less as you go on and get back to the life you are grateful to still have. I now see my post cancer life in the same way as I see grief. I definitely grieve the person I was before this..physically and mentally, so I allow myself some days of feeling sad or scared but then try to get back out of it the following day. It does get easier. Promise