Fear of cancer coming back.

Two years ago this month I started chemo followed by radiotherapy after being diagnosed with breast cancer. I was very ill with chemo and couldn’t finish the course but found radiotherapy better. I had the lump removed, lost all my hair but was positive throughout but over the last few months I am struggling every day with the fear that it will come back. How are you dealing with this please? Xx

  • Hello Wendy-Jane

    I'm sorry to hear about all that you've been through over the past two years. It sounds like it's been a difficult time even if it didn't necessarily feel like it whilst you were going through treatment. 

    What you've described is common amongst many people who have had cancer and from the posts I've read here on the forum, it's not uncommon for these feelings to be heightened around the time of an anniversary. 

    It's certainly worth seeking some professional help to process these thoughts and emotions if you've not already done so. This might be something that you're able to access through your breast care nurse or your GP. Alternatively, you might want to visit somewhere like Maggies if there is a centre near to you. Breast Cancer Now also runs a course called Moving Forward which you may find of interest. 

    If you'd like to talk things through with one of our nurses for some advice and support you're welcome to call them on 0808 800 4040, Monday to Friday 9am to 5pm. 

    I do hope that things settle and begin to improve for you Wendy-Jane. 

    Best wishes, 
    Jenn
    Cancer Chat moderator 

  • Hi Jenn thank you so much for your comforting reply. I did have 5 sessions of counselling through my doctor but it was agreed between us, because my anxiousness was purely to do with cancer and the fear of the cancer returning, it was best to seek counselling through MacMillan. 

  • Hello Wendy-Jane

    I'm glad to hear that you've had some support for the anxiety relating to cancer returning previously. Don't be afraid to get back in touch with Macmillan or your breast care nurse for more support if you're struggling. 

    I do hope that things settle for you soon. 

    Best wishes, 
    Jenn
    Cancer Chat moderator 

  • Hi Wendy-Jane,

    A very warm welcome to our forum.

    I am glad to hear that all went well with your cancer surgery, but sorry to hear that you are struggling..

    Once you've had a cancer diagnosis, the fear of recurrence is always with you. You can either let this worry rule the rest of your life, or you can live with it and make the most of the new life that you've been given. I have had 2 bouts of breast cancer within a year of one another. My positivity certainly took a dent when I had the second bout. I was thoroughly miserable and no fun to be with. 

    I eventually decided that life's too short to let this be my overriding thought every day, and realised that I would have to take the bull by the horns and do something about it. I attended a moving forward course, like the one that our moderator, Jenn, has suggested. I also attended a number of different classes/courses in pain management, mindfulness, weight loss, diet, exercise, etc. I availed of the wide range of facilities at Maggies and the Haven. These were very helpful and also gave me the opportunity to talk to others and to discover how they coped. I spoke to counsellors, but discovered that I needed someone that I "clicked" with, before they were of much help.  I joined a self-help group, which was very supportive, as I knew that whenever I was having a "wobble", I could always call on someone if needed. I am not saying that I don't still have the occasional "wobble", but it's no longer all consuming.

     I am now much happier in myself and am enjoying my life post-cancer. It's not the life I had pre-cancer. I don't think that it ever is for any of us. I am 14 years down the line from diagnosis and I still lead a busy and fulfilling life and I count my blessings every day.

    I hope that you too can find a way forward. It doesn't happen overnight, but it will come.

    Please keep in touch and let us know how you get on. We are always here for you.

    Kind regards,

    Jolamine xx

  • Thank you so much Jolamine such strong and caring words. I am definitely going to look into courses and other aspects of help too. I’m sad that you had cancer twice in such a short period of time but congratulations that you came through it and your positivity is endearing. 14 years is amazing and you deserve to be happy. I  didn’t let the cancer beat me through diagnosis etc and I will  fight to get myself back to as normal as is possible. You take care and I will stay in touch. Thank you again xx