Feel cancer has taken my old self away

Recovery from BC ( diagnosis last May) had surgery, chemo & radiotherapy. My life has pretty much gone back to normal . However it isn't . I'm struggling with my emotions, struggling at work( job I love) and can't seem to focus . People don't seem to understand how cancer messes with your life 

Not sure what to do, where to turn :-(

Parents
  • Breast cancer now have courses you may find helpful. Maybe the 'moving forward' course x

     

  • Thank you 

    I'll look into that ️

  • Hello my dear, I know too well what u are feeling. I wrote a piece you commented on last year. It's so so difficult and yes we are never truely the same again.

    I went back to work really soon well I started chemo January 22 and started working from home when I was well in February then went back full time in July  after finishing radiotherapy in June. Everyone was very welcoming and supportive but I have to say it didn't take long before everybody had forgot what I'd been through and expected the normal person to be present everyday. 
    I am a manager in the nhs so you would think they understand but that is so far from the truth. Anyway, what I can say is we will have down days that is natural and we will have good days, I have learnt that we need to understand how people see and interact with us as much as what we expect from them. We have to understand that they  havnt been through what we have and really have no idea but equally they want to carry on life as normal so it becomes a battle of what they expect from us and what we expect from them.

    I don't want pitty  I just want people to realise that when I say Im Knackered it's a very different knackered to theirs when they feel it. When I say I feel down again it's different to when they feel down, mine is because I am absolutely scared to death that this will come back and end my life, not down because I have too much to do or have too much to do as a mother. It's very different for me now.

    on the bright side I struggle but I don't intend to lie down and give in. I'm gonna give this life thing a run for it's money and enjoy whatever I can whenever I can.

    so chin up lovely we need to make it better, coz no one else will xxxxx

     

Reply
  • Hello my dear, I know too well what u are feeling. I wrote a piece you commented on last year. It's so so difficult and yes we are never truely the same again.

    I went back to work really soon well I started chemo January 22 and started working from home when I was well in February then went back full time in July  after finishing radiotherapy in June. Everyone was very welcoming and supportive but I have to say it didn't take long before everybody had forgot what I'd been through and expected the normal person to be present everyday. 
    I am a manager in the nhs so you would think they understand but that is so far from the truth. Anyway, what I can say is we will have down days that is natural and we will have good days, I have learnt that we need to understand how people see and interact with us as much as what we expect from them. We have to understand that they  havnt been through what we have and really have no idea but equally they want to carry on life as normal so it becomes a battle of what they expect from us and what we expect from them.

    I don't want pitty  I just want people to realise that when I say Im Knackered it's a very different knackered to theirs when they feel it. When I say I feel down again it's different to when they feel down, mine is because I am absolutely scared to death that this will come back and end my life, not down because I have too much to do or have too much to do as a mother. It's very different for me now.

    on the bright side I struggle but I don't intend to lie down and give in. I'm gonna give this life thing a run for it's money and enjoy whatever I can whenever I can.

    so chin up lovely we need to make it better, coz no one else will xxxxx

     

Children
No Data