Any advice for student nurses?

Does any one want to offer any advice for student nurses for communicating with patients with cancer? I never know what to say and I am often told off for saying things such as "I'm sorry to hear that" and "you're looking great!". Any particular care needs that you feel are really important that we should know but often find we don't? Help us out and have your say!

  • Hi there student nurse, welcome to the forum and I'm impressed that you are asking the best way to approach patients diagnosed with cancer. I have been in the hospital so many times over the last 5 and a half years that I've lost count, although I am in Canada, not the UK.  I don't think it matters much where we're from; suffering from cancer doesn't choose favorites and I'm sure we share a lot of the same feelings about it. I've always found that the best a nurse, or anyone for that matter, can say is "how are you doing today?" and/or "can I get you anything," or can I help you with that?" Some of us are quite okay talking openly about our diagnosis and some are not. I'm not sure what demands you have to meet as a student nurse, but here where I am, nurses are going steady all the time and don't have much time to actually spend with patients. Some people are in denial about their cancer diagnosis, so tread lightly there, and still others are really angry about having this terrible disease, so you almost need to know a little bit about your patient before approaching them. Whatever else you do, or don't do, don't say "I know how you feel." Unless you have cancer yourself, you really don't know how we feel.   

    As for me, I have always been really open about my disease and will talk openly about it,, but I'm likely among the minority. Most people that I've encountered would rather not talk about it at all, and I guess one has to respect the differences in people.

    Thank you for asking this question. You will make a great nurse when you're fully graduated!

    I'm sure others on here will have something to offer as well. Good luck with your studies.

    Lorraine 

  • Wow that's a difficult question! 

    You need to develop very good active listening skills and learn very early that cancer patients are as diverse as everyone else. For example, I will happily talk to strangers in a pub or on a train about my condition and its effects on my life but I have friends who are living with cancer to whom these things are very private and they would be very uncomfortable discussing it with anyone - especially someone much younger than they are.

    The best way round this is to simply ask at an early stage whether they are comfortable talking to you, if they say no just say well I'll keep this as brief as I can to do my job then.

    Bear in mind just where they are on their care pathway as their mental state and attitude will be influenced by this. This can range from newly diagnosed and scared out of their wits through long term survivors who are relatively comfortable living with cancer through to end of life and at peace with the World and the fact they will shortly be leaving.

    Always remember that these are human beings and not just "patients" - treat them as you would want others to treat you, or the people that you love, if you were in their situation and you won't go far wrong. 

    Finally - a genuine smile goes a very long way :-)

    Dave
    x

    ps for what NOT to say check out www.cancerresearchuk.org/.../12-things-never-to-say-to-someone-who-has-cancer