Tan 

firstly a very warm welcome 

I'm so sorry that you have had a diagnosis I had breast cancer nuly 22 

I can see why he's your x o really can't believe how a man could be like this I would definitely call the company you have the policy with and if no luck seek the legal advice .

stay here for support chats if you need to go help with your journey I found it a massive help , I should be long gone I finished everything in nov 22 but can't leave as so much support was here for me I feel I need fo give back 

good luck with everything big hugs love Lara ️

Tan 

I had invasive ductal also 

yes it's so hard at the beginning but let me promise you the way you feel at the moment doesn't last forever , I'm already back to a fizzy pop bottle but remember so well of how I felt at your time lovely .

and you could definitely do without that stress I can't believe how he could behave in that way he will have no luck for that 

love Lara ️

That's really reassuring - it's hard to imagine feeling 'normal' again! I'm pinballing from one worry to the next at the moment. 

It's so kind of you to come back on - positive stories really do help as it's hard not to think the worst when you first hear the news. 

I feel lucky that I found the lump and the doctors acted quickly. I so nearly didn't even go as I thought I was imagining it/making a fuss over nothing. 

Here's to getting back to fizzy pop bottle days ️
 

Hi Tantan,

I work in financial services. I would suggest you call the insurance company and see what they say, he may be entitled to half given that it's a joint policy but half is better than nothing. Put it this way if either of you had died, the other would be entitled to 100% of the sum assured. 

I hope you get this sorted and your treatment gets you back to full health.

Jane x

Thank you Jane - really appreciate you taking the time to reply. 

The insurers have advised to speak to a solicitor - so fingers crossed they can help. 

It's not even that he just wants half -  he wants the entire payout to be held in a joint account so I will need his permission when I need to access it. 

He has been violent to me in the past and also has a previous business go bankrupt so this is just a complete madness to me to be tied financially to someone like this.

Oh that puts a different spin on things. I'm sure that the insurance company could pay out two amounts given the circumstances. I don't think you should need a solicitor, personally. Ask to speak to someone senior and mention their vulnerable client policy. The FCA are hot on this now, you have a life changing cancer diagnosis and your ex husband has history of financial abuse. They should find a solution not put the onus on you. 

Best of luck 

Jane 

Thanks so much Jane - that's really helpful.  I spoke to the team today and explained and they will start the claims process without his signature for now at least. I feel so stupid for not sorting when the divorce was done - hindsight is a fine thing! It's reassuring to know that there are policies in place which may help resolve. 

Don't feel stupid, you can't think of everything and it's good in some ways as you may have cancelled it and then you wouldn't have any policy. I'm pleased that they are proceeding without his signature, I hope you get it paid out asap. I'm not sure you'll get all of the payment although it seems a low blow that someone can benefit from your critical illness! But at least it's progressing.

Please let me know how you get on. 

Good luck xx