Hi there - Happy New Year!

It's going to be one of those everyone's-different things, and depend on the structure of your working day, length of commute etc - lots of factors. I'd say the best scenario is to have an employer who is sympathetic to you giving it a go and then adjusting if it's too much or if you feel you can do more, but that's not always an option of course...

I went back to work full time in December. I was 6 weeks post-op after double mastectomy with diep, and it was okay, though on reflection I could maybe have done with waiting a couple more weeks.... I started 3 days in the office and 2 working from home (with the occasional day off for follow-up hospital appointmentments). I found driving home at the end of the day the most tiring thing. I tried alternating days but found it easier to work from home Monday and Tuesday, and used those days for external zoom meetings and calls, and then be in the office Wednesday to Friday, meaning I then had the weekend to rest.... but it depends on the work you do and how you like to work. How far into recovery are you? 

Hi [@notmyideaoffun]‍ 

Thanks so much for your reply, it is very helpful.

This is week 7 after surgery for me. In terms of recovery, I don't have pain and I have recovered arm movement. For the time being I don't do intense physical activity. As guided by the physio I do 3 times a day recovery exercises and a fast paced walk (8000 steps) every day. Next week I will meet with the physio to add weight exercises to my regime. I feel generally very tired during the day. I don't manage rest at night due to feeling uncomfortable in the abdominal area (it is generally swollen at the end of the day and when I seat for long time), and needing to go to the toilet many times.

My role is office based (over one hour drive each way). Currently due to COVID measures, people are encouraged to work from home. Although this can change any time, as we know. My return is planned week 12 after surgery. I used to work long hours every day before my leave. I want to keep it on the safe side, and make sure I have time to do the exercises and rest during the day. Hence, I was considering requesting phased return starting only with 4 or 5 hours a day for a couple of weeks fully remotely. And from there move to full time remote if it feels ok.

It sounds like you have a great plan and are on top of your recovery. You will just need to be strict with yourself and not overwork if you are working from home - have set hours and stick to them so you can make time to exercise... I get the abdomen swelling in the evenings too but it seems to magically disappear overnight. If I lie flat for an hour in the middle of the day it's then not so bad in the evenings so if you're on the go all the time I'd suggest giving that a try. Best wishes for a smooth return to work!

Afternoon [@notmyideaoffun]‍  [@amils]‍ 

Thankful to have found you!

I had single mastectomy with bilateral TUG reconstruction 4 months ago, finished radiotherapy before Xmas and am now thinking about my return to work.  My employer has been very supportive and given me the freedom to define my phased plan which is a bit daunting....for all the reasons you mention.

My movement on surgery side is still limited by a frozen shoulder!!  Physio is managing but progress is very slow and frustrating.  I've started yoga ‍♀️ with Adrienne which is hilarious more stick like however I am seeing small improvements in flexibility in both legs the nerve discomfort varies day to day and a rising desk will be an absolute must when I go back to the office.  Main concern for me is the line manager role, with 4 direct reports and heading a total of 70 people I am considering very slow and steady.

My sleep is very disrupted and the tiredness is normalising now but stepping back to work will need careful monitoring.  Currently I am proposing wk 1 2 half days nonconcurrent, then slowly moving to 3 1/2 days, then to concurrent half days stepping to full days nonconcurrent etc until back to full time, all being well about 6-8wk?  I know it sounds long but I want to keep moving forward and not risk too fast meaning set backs.

Your personal thoughts on your plans are just that and look sensible, my mantra to help my learning to look after myself which I share freely is 'I am worthy of time, care and love to heal'.  The 40+hr weeks as standard putting work 1st every time need to be things of the past

Here's to our successful and happy returns, sending hugs

xx

Hello [@Tricks]‍  your plan sounds waaaay better thought through than mine was! And I don't think it sounds long, particularly with you still having shoulder problems... everyone that has given me advice from their own experience has said that the slower you take it the easier your recovery. It has to be right.

I had to go back when I did not least because  was getting too used to being home... I kind of knew I had to "get back on the horse" before I got any more comfortable :)))

Evening [@notmyideaoffun]‍ 

There's a little bit of 'comfy' setting in too if I'm totally honest, or I think that's what it is?!  Still a lot of time spent in my head working through the last 6 months and what the next 6 hrs/days/weeks....... will or can be like.

Living life lighter & brighter is my goal.

Thanks for your kind words, guess we're all stepping through our returns in the best way for us :wink:

Be good to keep in touch on how it goes and share learnings

Take care

x

Thanks so much for the advice [@notmyideaoffun]‍. I am adding the lying flat during the day to my expected routine. I know what you mean by dissapearing overnight, 5 cm less around the belly button in the morning! You have really nailed, that my worst enemy is myself not sticking to hours. I am determined to manage it better this time.

I hope all is going well for you!

Dear [@Tricks]‍ 

First of all, I hope your frozen shoulder gets better soon, and your overall recovery continues progressing, even if slower that you would like (who wouldn't right?). I like yoga with Adrienne :) In case it is of use, before my surgery I got in touch with SafeFitTrial and they assigned me a personal trainer. She is specialised in those with cancer, fall prevention and pelvic floor.

I thank you enormously for sharing the detail about your role and your return plan. It does help me a lot to have a point of reference. I find your plan very sensible and I love your mantra. And I hope I can also keep it present and act upon it in my future.

I manage around 20 people, between internals and externals, but get demand for 40, so it is a very intense workplace, dealing with the art of impossible all the time. I am confident my return will be fully WFH, as the company is operating like that for the time being until further notice. I am also studying an MSc online and class starts in January again (ironically a module called Work and Well being which I am looking forward to it since I started the masters in 2020).

If I am honest with myself, I would like to ask to work even less hours at the beginning, based on my current physical status. A plan like yours would be perfect. I don't think my manager will oppose. But I feel guilty and weak for wanting that. What difference does it make to my company me working for 6(?) weeks 10 or 15 less hours in the big scheme of things? None. Probably having me half time would make them better than having me no time. And I am likely to add the same or more value. I will fight my diminissing thoughts. As you say, this is a few weeks, I should not over complicate it, and I am my most important project, the only one with real long term consequences I am the only one who can avoid.

To our successful and happy returns! I like the sound of that!

Lots of love.

Sorry for the disconnected replies, didn't see these ones before.

[@notmyideaoffun]‍  and [@Tricks]‍  you have been a mind savour for me this week.

You are totally right that everyone is different, in their conditions before treatment, in their treatment and in their recovery. Having a reference of what others have done, thinking of doing about all of this is helping enormously. It helps me to see the art of possible and to be more confident in discussing with my employer.

And definitely would love to keep in touch.

When are you going back [@Tricks]‍ ?

Take care

Morning [@amils]‍ 

I haven't confirmed my return yet, current note expires today however emotionally I am not ready, have started counselling through work employee support program and breast care nurse has also referred me for oncology psych support.  The high emotion is amplified by the tiredness due to Tamoxifen side effects..... so waiting to speak with oncologist about additional meds to help - can't think about going back before that's sorted. Also at clinic today to have mastectomy wound checked cos 4 wk now since radiotherapy and still got some weeping!!!

I believe for me at least another 4 wk until I start my slow & steady return.

Have a lovely day both [@notmyideaoffun]‍ 

Nic

x