How to help?

My Fiancé's mum was diagnosed in 2019 with what we think is lung cancer but it had spread by the time it was found. When they found it, it was in the lungs, abdomen and a small piece in the brain. 

Recently, they have found more smaller fragments in the brain which they think means it's spreading through the blood? My Fiancé's parents aren't too forthcoming with the information so we know it's bad but not sure what it means? Would anyone be able to tell us about this?

On a personal note, I'm also not sure how to support them. I'm trying to be a listening ear for my Fiancé but he's not sure how to feel as he doesn't understand.  

Also my Fiancé's mum is self employed and not been able to work. Are there any sick grants she could get as they are struggling? 

  • Hello Eaew501

    I'm sorry to hear about your fiance's Mum. It sounds like it's been a difficult time for you all and I can understand that you may have many concerns and questions about her diagnosis and how best you can support both them and your partner.

    There is no right nor wrong way to feel when a loved one is dealing with cancer. The confusion about his feelings that your fiance is feeling is natural and it sounds like you're already doing a great job by providing a supportive, listening ear to him. Just keep being there for him. 

    With regards to the financial question that you've asked, I'd recommend getting in touch with the Macmillan financial guidance service. They have people who are able to offer information and advice about what benefits or grants she, or her husband, may be able to claim. 

    It's understandable that you and your fiance have questions about the disease progression and what the future may hold for your loved one. You might find it helpful to give our team of nruses a call on 0808 800 4040. I'm sure they will be happy to chat things through with you and offer any advice, information, and support that they can. If you'd like to speak with them they're available Monday to Friday 9 am to 5 pm. 

    I hope this helps. 

    Best wishes, 
    Jenn
    Cancer Chat moderator