Hi [@Clayshooter]‍ 

I am so sorry that your wife has been diagnosed with Cancer, it is difficult for anyone whether it is you that was given the diagnoses or someone close to you.

I actually found it easier to deal with it when I was diagnosed with cancer, but when my Nan was it was as you said devastating, we don't want to see our loved ones suffer, we feel scared inside and the questions and the unknown is incredibly hard to bear.

There is no right or wrong way to deal with these things and you can start to feel isolated as others around you that are not going through it suddenly don't know what to say or start the pitying looks and the oneliners of "it will be alright"

Have you thought about a mobility scooter for her? so at least she can be out and about and spend time with you walking without actually having to walk. You could always hire one for the time being to see if she feels comfortable using it. I am 46 and have mobility issues and I did get one myself after I was diagnosed as the tiredeness and fatigue and pain meant I wasn't going out as much walking, with my dog so I still needed to be able to get out - normally I just use crutches and it was hard to get my head around using a scooter, but I was so thankful I got it as it made such a difference.

No-one plans for this and how it will affect us so it sounds like your are doing what you can to stay strong for your wife and taking yourself away from the situation to have a good cry. 

I'm sorry that there is nothing that can be said to take away what you are feeling, but it is so lovely to hear that you have had 43 years together, that she stills means so much to you. 

Please feel free to message me if you ever just want to vent, or talk.

Kay

Hi Kay . Thanks  for your reply . We have actually  just just got a small boot scooter . Only used it once as yet  my wife is on tablet  form of chemo which  have made her very tired.  Whitch you are probably aware of . She has just finished  thic course so hopefully will be a bit better  so e can get out . I think it  is very commendable  of you to engage  with people  in this position! !!