Dear Ange,

I had my chemo, "red death" in 2015, mastectomy in 2014.  Today cancer free, reconstruction using a back flap beginning 1/2020.  My doctor actually upset with me over the years because I don't take cancer seriously enough.  Fear time stands for False Evidence Appearing Real....I am almost 73 and having more fun than ever.  My hair grew back everywhere, I'm going to have perky breasts. I was very, very, very tired during chemo, so I rested and slept.  You are in my thiughts

Hi there ...

I havnt had it myself , but so many on here talk about " brain fog" which sounds just like what you've described... maybe others will pop on who have gone through this too .. sorry I can't help more .. but they say it does get better ... hope you have a pieceful xmas .. and 2020 is good to you ... Chrissie xx

Hi Ange,

Sorry to hear you are having a hard time.  I too find that thoughts of cancer, chemo and what might be are always whirring through my mind.  I find it helps to try to carry on as normal... getting dressed & putting on make up every day, going to work, seeing friends, watching feel good films, lots of bubble baths etc. Having said that, I don’t feel guilty at all about days where I do nothing. Sometimes you just need to rest. Listen to your body and do things when you can.

Have you tried journaling or adult colouring books? They can be quite therapeutic.  

S

I absolutely understand!!! I too have had massive panic attacks to the point where I've had drs ECG my heart as it's felt like I cannot breath and I physically have a knife in my chest! Its awful. What is your treatment plan? If you are having chemo, do the drugs change at any point? Mine did and it got A LOT better! This chemo brain lark IS real and IS very scary. People don't get it unless they've experienced it IMO. You are not alone. I found that the psychologist I saw was of very little help except for when she did some breathing exercises with me. It made me realise just how tight my chest was from the anxiety and that I HAD to force myself to try to take each day as it comes and therefore stay calm and not think about the what is as much. I found that rather than talking to a psychologist, talking to someone I knew outside of my family really helped. I didn't want to talk to my family I believe out of a need to protect them and make them think I was ok.

I wish you the most luck going!

Thank you so much Penelope,

So happy to hear your great news, congratulations,I Would really Appreciate Your Prayers,

Ange!

Thank you so much Chrissie,and many happy returns to you and yours,

Ange!

Hi Waldo,

Thanks for reply,I've just started journaling so hopefully that might help,I need to fight with myself to leave the house but I pray this panic and fear leaves me soon,xx

Thank you Coll0024,

Yes I'd rather speak to friends,I don't want to be upsetting my kids,

It's a very scary place to be at the moment,people are saying I should be getting better with it as treatment gos on but I seem to be getting worse,I pray these feelings leave me soon and get back to been able to leave the house,please keep me in your  thoughts as you will be in mine,x

I'm on 2 different types of chemo for lung cancer,have my 3rd one over me,next one on the 2nd of January,all going well and yes I've had that feeling in the chest also,it's frightening,here's wishing us all a better healthier 2020,x