talking to an Eight-year-old

 

Hello all I am looking for advice I’ve got a eight year old grandson who is now asking cancer questions we have been honest with him from the start as he is a grandads boy in the two years before my condition I taught him to swim and was coaching him as he wanted to do karate like me then Gioblastoma cat 5  raised it ugly head and that was the end of that but he can swim and has carried on with  the karate to the extent he’s fighting for the England team at the world championship the 19th 20th 22st at the K2” Crawly so proud of him my problem now is he’s just asked me am I going to die soon and in the next breath am I going to survive cancer it all the adverts on the TV I am sure now we have never lied to him but we haven’t had such hard question’s  has anyone had to deal wit this if so any help would be grateful we don’t want to lie but need to know how to speak to him about it he’s  eight going on fifteen and he’s my rock keeps me fighting on

  • Hi there ...

    I have that amazing relationship with my granddaughter... I've always told her in a gentle way possible , the truth ... she was 6 when I was diagnosed ... now nearly 8 ... and when she has asked me if I were going to die... I always said , the Drs were going to TRY really hard to make nanny better ... but if I did die , I'd be that little star next to the bright one as that's what we've always called my mum's star .. and I will look down every night and she could look up and see me too ...

    In telling the truth he will always trust you ... l was lied to when I was that age when no one would tell me my grandad had died .. they all told different stories... where I had another little girl tell me " your grandads dead "  I never forgave my family for that .. 

    I was gentle with my son when mum died .. he was 7 .. and told him, nanny would never be sick again and didn't need her walking stick and was happy up there ... I find children are much stronger then we realise , if it's done the right way .. it's when they pick up stuff they hear that makes them worry more .. 

    I know charities have to advertise for donations .. but I don't think they realise how hard it is for the whole family going through cancer .. it's on t.v all the time ... on the radio .. in magazines... on the Drs wall ... and sometimes when we need a little break from the word cancer ... it's everywhere .... so I can understand how it looks to these little ones .. and how scared it can make them ... 

    Hope that helps a tad ...  Chrissie x

  • Chrissie  

    thank you Chrissie  for the reply the star thing i like i always try to answer with the truth but its difficult we try to keep it simple but when a eight year asks is cancer going to kill you it chokes me up thanks again