Hi All

My Nanny has stage 4 lung cancer and was diagnosed a month ago. Since then everything has happened so quickly, she has started chemotherapy and immunotherapy but it has been so aggressive and she deteriates very quickly. One day she is OK, the next she will be very unwell. 

For almost a year me and my other half have had our dream holiday booked, we are going to America for 3 weeks in June. This has cost us about £8k all together, and this is our only chance to do it. 

Please, can anyone shed light on going on holiday when in this position? How can I go away for 3 weeks knowing my Nanny is here, and leaving knowing I may not see her again? Things are so up and down that I will never be able to confidently leave knowing she will be here when I return. My Nan is my best friend so this has been the hardest experience for me. 

I am also worried about spending my entire holiday feeling upset, worried, guilty, I'll constantly be worried and waiting for bad news. I am gutted as this is our once in a lifetime holiday and in a selfish way I know I will not enjoy it as I had dreamed to, it was meant to be our last carefree holiday.

Please give advice!